'My Friend, My Friend' by Anne Sexton
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Who will forgive me for the things I do?
With no special legend of God to refer to,
With my calm white pedigree, my yankee kin,
I think it would be better to be a Jew.
I forgive you for what you did not do.
I am impossibly quilty. Unlike you,
My Friend, I can not blame my origin
With no special legend or God to refer to.
They wear The Crucifix as they are meant to do.
Why do their little crosses trouble you?
The effigies that I have made are genuine,
(I think it would be better to be a Jew).
Watching my mother slowly die I knew
My first release. I wish some ancient bugaboo
Followed me. But my sin is always my sin.
With no special legend or God to refer to.
Who will forgive me for the things I do?
To have your reasonable hurt to belong to
Might ease my trouble like liquor or aspirin.
I think it would be better to be a Jew.
And if I lie, I lie because I love you,
Because I am bothered by the things I do,
Because your hurt invades my calm white skin:
With no special legend or God to refer to,
I think it would be better to be a Jew.
Editor 1 Interpretation
My Friend, My Friend by Anne Sexton: A Critical Analysis
Oh my goodness, where do I even begin with this one? My Friend, My Friend by Anne Sexton is one of those poems that just hits you like a ton of bricks. It's raw, it's emotional, and it's absolutely breathtaking in its complexity. But let's not get ahead of ourselves. Before we dive into the nitty gritty of this masterpiece, let's start with a brief overview of the poem itself.
Overview
My Friend, My Friend is a poem about the end of a friendship. It's written in the first person, and the speaker is addressing their former friend directly. Throughout the poem, the speaker reflects on their relationship with their friend, and the reasons why it ended. They touch on themes of betrayal, disappointment, and loss. But what really sets this poem apart is the way it's written. It's not your typical rhyming verse. It's not even written in clear stanzas. Instead, it's a series of fragmented thoughts and feelings that come together to create a hauntingly beautiful whole.
Interpretation
So, what does it all mean? What is Anne Sexton trying to convey with My Friend, My Friend? Well, there are a few different interpretations that could be drawn from the poem. Let's take a look at a few of them.
Loss and Betrayal
One of the most obvious themes of the poem is loss. The speaker has lost their friend, and they're struggling to come to terms with it. But it's not just the loss of the friendship itself that's bothering them. It's the way it ended. There's a sense of betrayal in the poem - something that's hinted at but never fully explained. We're left to wonder what exactly happened between these two friends. Was there a fight? Did one of them do something unforgivable? We don't know. But we do know that the speaker feels betrayed.
The Fragility of Friendship
Another theme that comes up in My Friend, My Friend is the fragility of friendship. Friends are supposed to be there for each other through thick and thin, but sometimes things fall apart. Sexton does an excellent job of capturing the way that fragile relationships can crumble under the weight of disappointment and hurt.
The Power of Memories
Throughout the poem, the speaker reflects on the memories they have of their friend. They remember the good times they shared, and the things they used to do together. These memories are powerful - they bring up a lot of emotions for the speaker. But they're fleeting, too. The speaker knows that they can never go back to those times. They can never reclaim what they once had with their friend. All they can do is hold on to the memories.
The Ambiguity of Life
Finally, there's an underlying sense of ambiguity that runs through the poem. We're never really sure what's going on. We don't know the exact circumstances of the friendship's demise. We don't even know the gender of the speaker or their friend. And yet, despite all this ambiguity, the poem still manages to pack an emotional punch. It's a reminder that life is messy and complicated, and sometimes we don't get all the answers we're looking for.
Literary Criticism
Of course, My Friend, My Friend isn't just about the themes and interpretations. It's also a masterful piece of writing in its own right. Let's take a closer look at some of the literary techniques Sexton uses to create this hauntingly beautiful poem.
Fragmentation
As I mentioned earlier, one of the most striking things about this poem is its fragmented structure. There are no clear stanzas or rhyming patterns. Instead, it's a series of disjointed thoughts and feelings. This fragmentation serves two purposes. Firstly, it mirrors the way that the speaker's thoughts are fragmented. They're struggling to make sense of what's happened, and their thoughts are all over the place. Secondly, it creates a sense of unease for the reader. We're never quite sure where we're going next, or what's coming next. It's unsettling, but in a good way.
Repetition
Another technique Sexton uses to great effect is repetition. Certain phrases are repeated throughout the poem, creating a sense of rhythm and momentum. For example, the line "My friend, my friend" is repeated several times. This repetition serves to underscore the importance of the friend in the speaker's life. Even though the friendship has ended, the friend is still a significant presence in the speaker's thoughts.
Imagery
Finally, Sexton uses powerful imagery to bring the poem to life. There are several vivid descriptions scattered throughout the poem. For example, there's a line that reads "we were two dolls in a toy house". This image perfectly captures the sense of intimacy and closeness that the two friends shared. There are several other examples of beautiful, evocative imagery throughout the poem, and they all serve to create a rich, immersive experience for the reader.
Conclusion
In conclusion, My Friend, My Friend is a stunning poem that deserves to be studied and appreciated. Anne Sexton has crafted a work of art that is both emotionally powerful and technically impressive. It's a poem that rewards close reading and interpretation, and it's a reminder of the power of language to capture complex emotions and experiences. If you haven't read this poem before, I highly recommend it. It's a true masterpiece.
Editor 2 Analysis and Explanation
My Friend, My Friend: An Analysis of Anne Sexton's Classic Poem
Anne Sexton is one of the most celebrated poets of the 20th century, known for her confessional style and her ability to explore the darkest corners of the human psyche. Her poem, My Friend, My Friend, is a prime example of her talent, as it delves into the complex nature of friendship and the ways in which it can both sustain and destroy us.
At its core, My Friend, My Friend is a poem about the paradoxical nature of friendship. On the one hand, friendship is a source of comfort and support, a bond that can help us weather the storms of life. As Sexton writes, "My friend, my friend, I was born doing / reference work in sin, and born / confessing it. This is what poets do, we / confess." Here, she is acknowledging the role that her friend plays in her life, as someone who she can confide in and who helps her make sense of the world.
But on the other hand, friendship can also be a source of pain and betrayal. Sexton writes, "My friend, my friend, I am the only one / who can live with my conscience, / so I am the only one who will / die by it." Here, she is acknowledging the fact that even the closest of friends can turn on us, and that ultimately, we are responsible for our own actions and the consequences that come with them.
Throughout the poem, Sexton uses vivid imagery and metaphor to explore the complexities of friendship. For example, she writes, "My friend, my friend, you are the only one / who will buy my evening clothes, / and the only one I know whose / ashes will be thrown into the / face of God." Here, she is comparing the act of buying evening clothes to the act of preparing for death, suggesting that our friends are the ones who help us navigate the transitions in life, both big and small.
Similarly, she writes, "My friend, my friend, I am not what I seem. / I am quiet when I should be screaming, / hysterical when I should be silent." Here, she is acknowledging the fact that our friends are the ones who see us for who we truly are, even when we are not able to show that side of ourselves to the world.
One of the most striking aspects of My Friend, My Friend is the way in which Sexton uses repetition to drive home her point. The phrase "my friend, my friend" is repeated throughout the poem, creating a sense of intimacy and familiarity that underscores the importance of the bond between the speaker and her friend. At the same time, the repetition also serves to highlight the paradoxical nature of friendship, as the phrase takes on different meanings depending on the context in which it is used.
For example, in the opening lines of the poem, the phrase "my friend, my friend" is used to suggest a sense of camaraderie and shared experience. But later in the poem, when Sexton writes, "My friend, my friend, I am not your friend," the phrase takes on a more confrontational tone, suggesting that even the closest of friends can have their disagreements and misunderstandings.
Ultimately, My Friend, My Friend is a powerful meditation on the nature of friendship and the ways in which it can both sustain and destroy us. Through her use of vivid imagery, metaphor, and repetition, Sexton creates a portrait of a complex and multifaceted relationship, one that is both comforting and challenging, supportive and confrontational.
As readers, we are left with the sense that friendship is a delicate balance, one that requires constant attention and care. But we are also left with the sense that, despite its challenges, friendship is ultimately worth the effort, as it provides us with a sense of connection and understanding that is essential to our well-being.
In the end, My Friend, My Friend is a testament to the power of poetry to explore the deepest aspects of the human experience, and to help us make sense of the world around us. It is a poem that will resonate with anyone who has ever struggled with the complexities of friendship, and who has found solace and support in the bonds that connect us to others.
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