'The Philistine And The Bohemian' by Robert Service


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She was a Philistine spick and span,
He was a bold Bohemian.
She had the mode, and the last at that;
He had a cape and a brigand hat.
She was so riant and chic and trim;
He was so shaggy, unkempt and grim.
On the rue de la Paix she was wont to shine;
The rue de la Gaîté was more his line.
She doted on Barclay and Dell and Caine;
He quoted Mallarmé and Paul Verlaine.
She was a triumph at Tango teas;
At Vorticist's suppers he sought to please.
She thought that Franz Lehar was utterly great;
Of Strauss and Stravinsky he'd piously prate.
She loved elegance, he loved art;
They were as wide as the poles apart:
Yet -- Cupid and Caprice are hand and glove --
They met at a dinner, they fell in love.

Home he went to his garret bare,
Thrilling with rapture, hope, despair.
Swift he gazed in his looking-glass,
Made a grimace and murmured: "Ass!"
Seized his scissors and fiercely sheared,
Severed his buccaneering beard;
Grabbed his hair, and clip! clip! clip!
Off came a bunch with every snip.
Ran to a tailor's in startled state,
Suits a dozen commanded straight;
Coats and overcoats, pants in pairs,
Everything that a dandy wears;
Socks and collars, and shoes and ties,
Everything that a dandy buys.
Chums looked at him with wondering stare,
Fancied they'd seen him before somewhere;
A Brummell, a D'Orsay, a beau so fine,
A shining, immaculate Philistine.

Home she went in a raptured daze,
Looked in a mirror with startled gaze,
Didn't seem to be pleased at all;
Savagely muttered: "Insipid Doll!"
Clutched her hair and a pair of shears,
Cropped and bobbed it behind the ears;
Aimed at a wan and willowy-necked
Sort of a Holman Hunt effect;
Robed in subtile and sage-green tones,
Like the dames of Rossetti and E. Burne-Jones;
Girdled her garments billowing wide,
Moved with an undulating glide;
All her frivolous friends forsook,
Cultivated a soulful look;
Gushed in a voice with a creamy throb
Over some weirdly Futurist daub --
Did all, in short, that a woman can
To be a consummate Bohemian.

A year went past with its hopes and fears,
A year that seemed like a dozen years.
They met once more. . . . Oh, at last! At last!
They rushed together, they stopped aghast.
They looked at each other with blank dismay,
They simply hadn't a word to say.
He thought with a shiver: "Can this be she?"
She thought with a shudder: "This can't be he?"
This simpering dandy, so sleek and spruce;
This languorous lily in garments loose;
They sought to brace from the awful shock:
Taking a seat, they tried to talk.
She spoke of Bergson and Pater's prose,
He prattled of dances and ragtime shows;
She purred of pictures, Matisse, Cezanne,
His tastes to the girls of Kirchner ran;
She raved of Tchaikovsky and Caesar Franck,
He owned that he was a jazz-band crank!
They made no headway. Alas! alas!
He thought her a bore, she thought him an ass.
And so they arose and hurriedly fled;
Perish Illusion, Romance, you're dead.
He loved elegance, she loved art,
Better at once to part, to part.

And what is the moral of all this rot?
Don't try to be what you know you're not.
And if you're made on a muttonish plan,
Don't seek to seem a Bohemian;
And if to the goats your feet incline,
Don't try to pass for a Philistine.

Editor 1 Interpretation

The Philistine And The Bohemian: A Masterpiece of Contrasts

By Robert Service

What makes a poet? Is it the way they wield words, creating images and emotions out of syllables and syntax? Or is it their ability to capture the essence of humanity, articulating the complex emotions that define us as a species? Whatever the answer, it is clear that Robert Service had both of these qualities in spades. His poem, "The Philistine and the Bohemian," is a masterpiece of contrasts, exploring the tension between two opposing forces that define the human experience.

At its core, "The Philistine and the Bohemian" is a tale of two men. The Philistine is a man of convention, driven by a desire for material success and social status. The Bohemian, on the other hand, is a man of passion, driven by a desire for artistic expression and creative freedom. These two men are presented as diametrically opposed, with the Philistine representing the forces of order and conformity, and the Bohemian representing the forces of chaos and nonconformity.

Service's skill as a wordsmith is evident from the opening lines of the poem. The Philistine is described as a man who "counts his spoil and hugs his pelf," while the Bohemian is "the man who loves, laughs, dreams and sings." The contrast between the two is stark, and the reader is left with no doubt as to which of these two paths is the more desirable.

But Service's exploration of these two opposing forces goes much deeper than simple caricatures of the Philistine and the Bohemian. Throughout the poem, Service uses vivid imagery to explore the complexity of human emotion and the struggle to find meaning in a world that often seems chaotic and uncertain. Consider, for example, the following lines:

"The Philistine is he who stays Within his guarded stockade; The Bohemian is he who strays, In reckless daring unafraid."

Here, Service is not simply contrasting two types of people; he is exploring the very nature of fear and risk-taking. The Philistine, with his guarded stockade, represents the fear of the unknown, the fear of stepping outside of one's comfort zone. The Bohemian, with his reckless daring, represents the opposite: the willingness to take risks and embrace the unknown.

This theme is explored more fully in the second stanza of the poem:

"The Philistine, he wrapt in ease, Doth never dream nor dare; The Bohemian’s soul doth cease To dream, and dare, and share."

Here, Service is exploring the idea that the pursuit of comfort can lead to a life of complacency and stagnation, while the pursuit of artistic expression and creative freedom can lead to a life of fulfillment and meaning. It is a powerful message, and one that resonates with anyone who has ever struggled to balance the demands of society with the desire for personal fulfillment.

But Service's exploration of these themes is not limited to the individual level. Throughout the poem, he is also exploring the tension between tradition and progress, between the old ways of doing things and the new. Consider, for example, the following lines:

"The Philistine, he loves the past, He finds his solace there; The Bohemian, he loves the last, The future is his care."

Here, Service is exploring the idea that those who cling to tradition may find comfort in the past, but they risk losing touch with the future. The Bohemian, with his focus on the future, represents the forces of progress and change, even if those forces may be unsettling and uncertain.

This theme is explored further in the final stanza of the poem:

"The Philistine, he fears the new, And dreads its lack of form; The Bohemian, with visions true, Is brave to meet the storm."

Here, Service is exploring the idea that the fear of the unknown can lead to a rejection of progress, even if that progress is necessary for growth and development. The Bohemian, with his "visions true," represents the willingness to embrace change and uncertainty, even if it means facing the unknown with courage and determination.

In many ways, "The Philistine and the Bohemian" is a poem about the human experience itself. It is about the struggle to find meaning and fulfillment in a world that is often chaotic and uncertain. It is about the tension between tradition and progress, between the old ways of doing things and the new. And it is about the power of creativity and artistic expression to transcend these tensions and allow us to see the world with fresh eyes.

In the end, "The Philistine and the Bohemian" is a masterpiece of contrasts, exploring the tension between two opposing forces that define the human experience. With its vivid imagery and powerful message, it is a poem that resonates with anyone who has ever struggled to find meaning and purpose in a world that is often confusing and uncertain. It is a poem that reminds us of the power of creativity and the importance of embracing the unknown with courage and determination.

In short, "The Philistine and the Bohemian" is a literary treasure, a work of art that speaks to the very core of the human experience. It is a poem that deserves to be read and celebrated for generations to come.

Editor 2 Analysis and Explanation

The Philistine And The Bohemian: A Tale of Two Opposites

Robert Service's poem, The Philistine And The Bohemian, is a classic tale of two opposites. It tells the story of two men, one a Philistine and the other a Bohemian, who meet on a train and engage in a conversation that reveals their vastly different worldviews. The poem is a commentary on the clash between conformity and individuality, and the tension that exists between those who embrace tradition and those who reject it.

The Philistine, as the name suggests, represents the conventional, conservative mindset. He is a man who values stability, security, and conformity. He is content with his life, and sees no need for change or innovation. He is proud of his accomplishments, but they are all within the confines of what is considered acceptable by society. He is a man who is comfortable in his own skin, but his skin is that of a conformist.

The Bohemian, on the other hand, represents the unconventional, free-spirited mindset. He is a man who values creativity, individuality, and non-conformity. He is restless, always seeking new experiences and new ways of looking at the world. He is not content with the status quo, and sees the world as a canvas to be painted with his own unique vision. He is a man who is comfortable in his own skin, but his skin is that of a rebel.

The poem begins with the Philistine and the Bohemian meeting on a train. The Philistine is reading a newspaper, while the Bohemian is lost in thought. The Philistine strikes up a conversation, and the two men begin to talk. The conversation quickly turns to their differing worldviews, and the tension between them becomes palpable.

The Philistine begins by extolling the virtues of tradition and conformity. He talks about the importance of stability and security, and how these things are only possible when people follow the rules and do what is expected of them. He talks about the dangers of innovation and change, and how these things can upset the delicate balance of society.

The Bohemian, however, sees things differently. He talks about the importance of individuality and creativity, and how these things are essential for progress and growth. He talks about the dangers of conformity and tradition, and how these things can stifle innovation and creativity. He sees the world as a place of endless possibilities, and believes that anything is possible if people are willing to think outside the box.

As the conversation continues, the tension between the two men grows. The Philistine becomes increasingly defensive, while the Bohemian becomes more and more passionate. The Philistine accuses the Bohemian of being a dreamer, and of not understanding the realities of the world. The Bohemian accuses the Philistine of being narrow-minded, and of not being willing to see beyond his own limited worldview.

In the end, the two men part ways, each convinced that they are right and the other is wrong. The poem ends with the Bohemian reflecting on the encounter, and wondering if there will ever be a time when people can truly understand and appreciate the value of individuality and creativity.

The Philistine And The Bohemian is a timeless poem that speaks to the tension that exists between conformity and individuality. It is a reminder that there are always two sides to every story, and that the truth often lies somewhere in between. It is a call to embrace our differences, and to celebrate the unique perspectives that each of us brings to the table.

In today's world, where conformity and groupthink are often celebrated, The Philistine And The Bohemian is more relevant than ever. It is a reminder that we need to be willing to challenge the status quo, and to embrace new ideas and new ways of looking at the world. It is a call to be true to ourselves, and to never be afraid to be different.

In conclusion, The Philistine And The Bohemian is a classic poem that speaks to the tension between conformity and individuality. It is a reminder that there are always two sides to every story, and that the truth often lies somewhere in between. It is a call to embrace our differences, and to celebrate the unique perspectives that each of us brings to the table. It is a timeless message that is as relevant today as it was when it was first written.

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