     
Tina M.
25/F/NV
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Last Login: | 4075 d | |
Pageviews: | 3894 | |
Journals: | 7 | |
Writings: | 32 | |
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 Monday
Mood: The Usual
Posted on 2008-10-06 20:37:28
Hello to you!
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Monday
Mood: The Usual
Posted on 2008-10-06 20:36:59
Hello! Today is a goo day!
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Today
Mood: The Usual
Posted on 2008-08-18 06:48:31
Today...I am doing good. Ethan will be one in a month and me and my husband are doing great....
Tired of the summer and hopeing for a soon fall.
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Untitled Entry
Mood: Happy
Posted on 2008-07-26 17:19:26
A wife and a new mom is very exciting. I feel more relaxed and happier than I ever have and I'm lovin' life!
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Untitled Entry
Mood: Overwhelmed
Posted on 2007-10-20 18:26:01
I have transitioned into a new phase of my life. I am now a wife, a new mother and am living in a new place. It's confusing and scary, but I'm trying my best to not let my emotional self get the best of me.
One day at a time.
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Untitled Entry
Mood: The Usual
Posted on 2006-12-22 07:06:42
same old shit
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Untitled Entry
Mood: Stressed
Posted on 2006-12-16 14:13:23
Well, at work again...I hate this. I'm having a bad day because Justin and I broke up this morning. Not that it came as a suprise to me, I was waiting around for it. Here's the thing I'm not going to be a good girlfriend and here's why...When I was 16 I met this perfect person who I loved for 4 years, he's everything I never knew I needed and I will never let him go no matter what I say to convience my mind otherwise. I was angry with him and distant(literally and emotionally) and I couldn't handle it. I met someone who I married for 2 years. This person and I are so different I couldn't lie to myself anymore so I left him and divorced him...not the easiest thing so I kept busy parting, seeing guys, lieing, and messing up at work. And I'm in the military where there's no room to mess up, cause you'll get into a lot of trouble which I really hate this job and sometimes I feel like I don't care. With all this I met another guy, named Justin. He was somone I could escape with and though I seem like we're also different I always wanted him and that feeling meant more to me than our differences. But alcohol can be a bitch , especially when I feel so messed up in the head...as I say in my poem "Defectus"....anyway, I would go out and get drunk and yell at him, treat him like shit, leave him to wonder and to be alone, lie to him.He would believe rumors that weren't true and I hated that. We broke up and I hooked up with someone who he found out about, I denied it only because he doesn't need to know anything unnecessary I think, besides it's between me and that person, not him...especially when we're broken up and I think we weren't going to get back together. So, he found out and we broke up because I'm stupid and fucked up and when my mindset gets to the point where I don't care I will destroy everything around me, including myself. So it's over, he doesn't trust me and shouldn't and he probably believes every little rumor cause the military is like high school for adults. I hate it and sometimes like today I feel like I just can't take it anymore, I wish I could delete bad days, I wish I didn't know a lot of the people I've come to know. Is it bad to say I love Justin eventhough I did those things to him? I don't know. I'm confused, I'm giving in....
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