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Misty Dawn
18/f/Right Here.

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  • Art Copyright Jimmy Ruska


    Mood: The Usual

    Posted on 2008-02-10 01:24:56

       it's a cake in a bakery window
    staring at you longingly
    take me away
    save me the insanity
    i don't like cake.



    Mood: The Usual

    Posted on 2007-10-24 14:27:31

    Have mercy on me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i have been so busy this week with senior announcements and all that mumbo that i haven't had time to play with my ES kitten Poor thing. Well anyway! I was sitting at home and i decided something. I AM QUITTING CONQUERONLINE! for two whole weeks i will deny myself that drug! that addiction!

    It's strange. I like the game, i understand the human element behind it, but it is still a game. I get caught up in it sometimes. Drama. love. Hatred. It's all there and it's all so hard to avoid. Either way i'm quitting for a while. Wish me luck.

    Poem of my Journal.

    An emotion like a poison,
    i can sense the fire
    Veins burning with

    I love you
    i love you
    i love you
    and its all a dream
    waking from another night
    of messenger and gameplay
    level 100
    please log on soon.


    I suppose...

    Mood: The Usual

    Posted on 2007-10-13 11:09:36

       I really do offend people without meaning to. Jebus people, I'm not the bad one. Don't be nice to another and not to me just because you don't think I was right in my posts.

    And seriously, those guidelines were intended to help people.

    Next time I guess I just won't help a friend. God forbid someone love someone else enough to attack someone just for them. Okay, now I'm jsut being bitter about it. Intenet drama...Lord, I play conqueronline and boy, is there enought drama there. reality and Binary.....oi. I'm gonna pre-write my flames from now on I suppose. Lest I say something the wrong way. It happens. Via internet it really is all about how well you can weave your words. Do it wrong and your meaning is blurred, dirtied, and misunderstood. Not that there's much to misunderstand in a flame...lol.

    Journal Poem of the Week (or day depending)

    A flame is ignited
    the trees bend away
    lord the fire
    it incinerates

    The child sits in a crimson pool
    the twilight illusion
    meant for fools
    (pause please)

    .there is a word
    written on a tree
    and is this my dream?
    i followed you
    i saw the end of time

    vampire fire
    loving it all
    but love burns
    and love turns
    the best intentions
    to smoldering ash
    and i whisper to the crimson sun
    let me live
    let me live
    and let me love.

    Eh...mood poem, makes no sense, eh?



    Mood: The Usual

    Posted on 2007-10-12 20:55:05

       Guidelines to not being a dick when commenting:

    1. When you open a poem and read it, whether or not you read of of it, whether you liked it or not, whether it was good or not...leave a comment. Explain why it is one way or the other.

    2: Cool poem, really great, you're good, loved it, you effing suck! this poem had no imagery, etc. << those are not comments. A comment is where you explain why the poem was good, why you loved it, what you think could be done to fix whatever problem there is with it. etc.

    3: When leaving a comment with criticism, MAKE DAMN SURE THAT IT IS CONSTRUCTIVE and not just a barrage of do this do that, this was stupid, boring, etc. That is called opinion. Leave something that gives advice without hurting the other persons feelings, dissing them, ranting on them, or being a prick to them.

    4: NEVER EVER tell someone to stop using a particular word or phrase. One, it's none of your concern if they choose a word. Reguardless of how cliché, redundant, or over-used the word is, it is NOT your place to say whether or not people can use it. That is a violation of the freedom of speech, kiddies.

    5: If you absolutely MUST harp about spelling, DON'T make it every word that they messed up and put it at the beginning of the comment. Leave it for last. Example: oh, and by the way, you should go back and re-read your piece, I believe you have a few spelling errors, prehaps have a friend proof-read for you? << it's called advice and suggestion. Not list and demand.

    6: Grammar: Grammar is very important, but don't be a dick about it. if someone has 'faulty' grammar, it would be best to explain where they messed up. prehaps they chose to have bad grammar to give the piece a 'feel' or 'atmosphere' or prehaps it's just a simple typing mistake.

    7: punctuation: Oh dear lord. I really despise it when people attack the lack/over-use of punctuation. This is where creative license comes into play. NOT all writers like to use perfect punctuation. Prehaps no one has read a poem that lacked puctuation. I myself don't use much punctuation, i use it when neccessary, but damn! Like I'm gonna waste my time making sure every little comma is in place. Let the reader catch his/her own breath (THAT came from a quote that I don't fully remember). So if you see a poem without punctuation, please stop and think about the possibility that the author did that on purpose.

    8: Suicide poetry: Suicide poetry is NOT bad. Okay, it's a little redundant, it's ridiculously whiny, BUT think about this. It is by far and beyond BETTER that our depressed little (or big, who says adults can't write about suicide o.O) friend is expressing their pain and anguish on paper with a pen rather than in their wrists with a shard of glass. It helps me when I'm feeling like a pile of unicorn poo to write it out, to scream and curse and stab things WITH A PEN ON PAPER than to thrash about and cause either myself or others bodily harm. Plus, it's good practice. Eventually they will become encouraged, inspired and determined. And BAM! they get the point and they become something better than what they were when they began. So next time you see a suicide/angsty/i hate you/i hate me/etc. poem, don't be a dick and say, God, you little freaking emo, get a life! Get over yourself! because that will make them feel even worse and they will probably jump off a bridge or something.

    9: The Rule of 3 for comments: Yeah, there is a 'line'. comments should be no less than three (3) lines and no more than three (3) paragraphs. If it is neccessary to create one longer than this, simply finish up at the 'line' then resume in a private message. If your comment is anything less than 3 lines then it's not a comment. Think about the piece, THEN comment.

    10: reply to those who comment on your work. EVEN IF they are pricks. It's also nice to read their work as well and give them a comment. Those Who Give Shall Recieve.

    11: Close everything with at least one nice thing even if it's simply, Best wishes, good luck, keep it up, etc. These things give your comment a nice touch. Let's the person know that you aren't a bad person and that you don't mean harm. This doesn't work, however, if everytihng you put in the comment was laced with contempt and ignorant opinion.

    12: To err is human: When you read a piece, don't, for one second, expect perfection. We are all human and make mistakes, we are all poets and have the freedom of Creative License. Take this to heart. Perfection is a delusion and should be banned, if you think otherwise **slap to the face**

    That's it for now.
    If I come up with anything else, you will be the first to know.

    Have a good day and enjoy yourself,

    (p.s. you don't have to take what I say seriously, nor do I expect you to. Hey, my recip. is only 70% so, although I know my own rules, I still am human and struggle.


    Not being silly

    Mood: Inspired

    Posted on 2007-09-26 14:03:28

       So i read this poem earlier that interested me. It was called 'Element pt.2' by one Awastedsky. This is sorta my 'poetic response', if you will, to that poem. Forgive me, this does it no justice.

    I took a line and this is what i got
    a story with no plot
    and it was a lie.

    soldi, steady
    take it away, give it away
    i don't want to see this
    stained and dececrated.

    Intensity. Passion.
    The different obsession.
    All this time, is this what i learned?
    if it's flames that scorch,
    if it's a spark that stings
    can i take it back? can i fix this mistake?
    there is no sea to quench this flame.

    Innocence. Rest.
    I'll take myself to the ocean
    and throw myself in
    take me Posiedon
    away from him.
    I've fallen, innocence, ignorance.
    and the waters calm me, and i can rest.

    Excitement. Truth.
    I'll tell you my secrets
    when you're ready
    i'll show you into my hopes and my dreams
    the winter nights, the fall evenings
    and all the whispered words
    that i forgot to write.
    with the intensity of a temest
    at the tip of the maelstrom
    i can kiss you with a lie
    and you will never know
    on second thought
    i will tell you nothing
    you don't need to know
    this is what the elements think of me,
    What do they think of you?

    So this is shitty, i wanted it to be all awesome and meaningful, but eh...i tried lol. Now the last lines are taken from 'element pt.2' as was the general layout. the best form of flattery is imitation. ahaha. heh...hmmm.


    Holy Grapefruit

    Mood: The Usual

    Posted on 2007-09-25 12:37:19

       Walking in the rain to the bank then walking through the drive-thru to cash a check is good for the soul, not so good for my beautiful black skater shoes :(

    Untitled Entry

    Mood: The Usual

    Posted on 2007-09-21 11:43:38

       So I was driving around in my imaginary car in an imaginary place a couple of not-days ago and i realized something significant...there were bananas in the kitchen.


    Mood: The Usual

    Posted on 2007-09-21 11:42:45


    Is It.....

    Mood: really really sad.....

    Posted on 2007-08-17 20:24:05

       Is it selfish to be jealous when you find someone who, despite being much younger than yourself, is better than you? Is it wrong to want to cry because it makes you feel pathetic and talentless? Is it meaningless to be want to give up because you haven't the will the continue since it was crushed by self-doubt?

    i'm doubting myself...and i'm crying...because i feel useless...im crying because i feel talentless and pathetic...... I'm jealous becuase despite my devotion to what i do, i am still outdone...i am still worthless...i'm doubting myself...i'm doubting my poetry and my skills as an artist....i'm crying...



    Mood: KILL!!!

    Posted on 2007-07-07 00:42:03

       another stint of in-activity has ended! i plan to be up and runnig on a regular basis VERY SOON! so apologies to all for my lateness! also, i shall do my damndest to at least balance out my reciprocation because, clearly, i was lax in my duty -.-