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The Battle Analysis

Author: poem of Robert Service Type: poem Views: 0

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Dames should be doomed to dungeons

Who masticate raw onions.

She was the cuddly kind of Miss

          A man can love to death;

But when I sought to steal a kiss

          I wilted from a breath

With onion odour so intense

          I lost my loving sense.

Yet she was ever in my thought

          Like some exotic flower,

And so a garlic bulb I bought

          And chewed it by the hour;

Then when we met I thrilled to see

          'Twas she who shrank from me.

So breath to breath we battled there,

          To dominate each other;

And though her onions odious were,

          My garlic was a smother;

Till loth I said: 'If we would kiss

          Let's call an armistice.

'Now we have proved that we are true

          To our opinions,

My garlic I'll give up if you

          Give up your onions.'

And so next day with honey sips

          How sweet her lips!


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