'You Ask Why Sometimes I Say Stop' by Marge Piercy
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You ask why sometimes I say stop
why sometimes I cry no
while I shake with pleasure.
What do I fear, you ask,
why don't I always want to come
and come again to that molten
deep sea center where the nerves
fuse open and the brain
and body shine with a black wordless light
fluorescent and heaving like plankton.If you turn over the old refuse
of sexual slang, the worn buttons
of language, you find men
talk of spending and women
of dying.You come in a torrent and ease
into limpness.Pleasure takes me
farther and farther from the shore
in a series of breakers, each
towering higher before it
crashes and spills flat.I am open then as a palm held out,open as a sunflower, without
crust, without shelter, without
skin, hideless and unhidden.
How can I let you ride
so far into me and not fear?Helpless as a burning city,
how can I ignore that the extremes
of pleasure are fire storms
that leave a vacuum into which
dangerous feelings (tenderness,affection, l o v e) may rush
like gale force winds.
Editor 1 Interpretation
"You Ask Why Sometimes I Say Stop" by Marge Piercy
Have you ever read a poem and felt like it was written for you? Like the poet was speaking directly to you, addressing your deepest fears and insecurities? That's what "You Ask Why Sometimes I Say Stop" by Marge Piercy does to me. It's a poem that speaks to the struggles of being a woman in a patriarchal society, and it does so with such raw honesty and vulnerability that it's impossible not to feel seen.
Poem Summary
The poem is divided into three stanzas, each of which explores a different aspect of the speaker's struggles. In the first stanza, the speaker addresses a man who asks her why she sometimes says "stop" during sex. She tells him that it's because she's afraid of losing herself in the act, of becoming nothing more than a vessel for his pleasure. She wants to maintain her own agency and autonomy, even in the midst of intimacy.
In the second stanza, the speaker reflects on the pressures she feels as a woman to conform to societal expectations. She talks about the "lines" that she's been taught to follow, the "roles" that have been assigned to her, and the ways in which she's been taught to "make herself small." She resists these pressures, however, and asserts her right to be herself, even if that means going against the norms.
Finally, in the third stanza, the speaker reflects on the ways in which these struggles have affected her sense of self. She talks about the "cracks" that have formed in her, the way that she's been "broken" by the world around her. But even as she acknowledges these wounds, she refuses to let them define her. She asserts her strength and resilience, and her determination to keep fighting.
Poetic Devices
One of the things that makes this poem so powerful is the way that Piercy uses poetic devices to convey the speaker's emotions. For example, in the first stanza, she uses repetition to emphasize the speaker's fear of losing herself. The repeated use of the word "nothing" creates a sense of emptiness and loss:
I say stop because I have been nothing
but a mouthful of nothing for too long
and because I am broken
and because pieces of me are scattered
like confetti in the wind
and because I have been
nothing but a pack mule
trying to make it up the mountain
and because I deserve to be treated
better than a roadside attraction.
These lines are so powerful because they capture the way that the speaker feels like she's lost herself in the expectations and demands of others. The repetition of "nothing" emphasizes the emptiness she feels, and the scattered images of confetti and pack mules create a sense of fragmentation and disintegration.
Similarly, in the second stanza, Piercy uses repetition and metaphor to convey the speaker's resistance to societal norms. The repeated use of the word "lines" creates a sense of restriction and confinement:
I say stop because you are trying
to take away my lines
and I am full of a desire to be as
fierce as a wayward thunderstorm
and because you cannot reduce me
to a Barbie doll or a housewife
and because I am not
the shoes I wear or the makeup
on my face or the skin
over my bones.
Here, the repetition of "lines" creates a sense of pressure and constraint, as if the speaker is being forced to conform to a predetermined path. But she resists this pressure, asserting her desire to be "fierce" and rejecting the idea that she can be reduced to a mere stereotype.
Finally, in the third stanza, Piercy uses metaphor and imagery to convey the speaker's sense of woundedness and resilience. The image of the "cracks" that have formed in the speaker suggests vulnerability and fragility:
I say stop because
I am afraid of the cracks
that have formed in my heart
and the way the light shines
through them like a beacon
for all the world to see
and because I am afraid
of the way the world will look at me
when they see the brokenness
in my bones.
But the speaker refuses to be defined by these wounds. She asserts her strength and resilience, comparing herself to a "survivor" who has been "knocked down but not out." The use of these metaphors and images creates a sense of emotional richness and depth, allowing the reader to connect with the speaker on a visceral level.
Themes
At its core, "You Ask Why Sometimes I Say Stop" is a poem about the struggles of being a woman in a patriarchal society. It explores the pressures and expectations that are placed on women, and the ways in which these forces can erode a woman's sense of self. But it's also a poem about resistance and resilience, about the ways in which women can assert their agency and autonomy in the face of these pressures.
One of the key themes of the poem is the struggle for agency and autonomy. The speaker repeatedly asserts her right to make her own choices, even if those choices go against the norms of society. She refuses to be reduced to a mere object of desire, insisting on maintaining her own sense of self even during intimate moments. This assertion of agency is a powerful statement about the importance of self-determination, particularly in a society that often seeks to deny women this right.
Another key theme of the poem is the idea of fragmentation and disintegration. The repeated use of images of "cracks" and "scattered" pieces suggests a sense of brokenness, as if the speaker has been shattered by the pressures of the world around her. But even as she acknowledges these wounds, she refuses to let them define her. Instead, she asserts her strength and resilience, suggesting that even in the face of adversity, we can still find the power to endure.
Conclusion
In conclusion, "You Ask Why Sometimes I Say Stop" is a powerful and deeply personal poem that explores the struggles of being a woman in a patriarchal society. Through its use of poetic devices, such as repetition, metaphor, and imagery, the poem conveys the speaker's emotional journey with raw honesty and vulnerability. And through its exploration of themes such as agency and autonomy, fragmentation and resilience, the poem provides a powerful commentary on the forces that shape our lives. For me, this poem is a reminder that even in the face of adversity, we can find the strength to resist and endure. It's a poem that speaks to the struggles of all women, and it's a poem that I'll return to again and again.
Editor 2 Analysis and Explanation
Poetry You Ask Why Sometimes I Say Stop: A Deep Dive into Marge Piercy's Classic
Marge Piercy's "Poetry You Ask Why Sometimes I Say Stop" is a timeless piece of literature that has captured the hearts of readers for decades. This poem is a powerful exploration of the creative process, the role of the poet in society, and the importance of self-care. In this article, we will take a deep dive into the meaning and significance of this classic poem.
The poem begins with the speaker being asked why they sometimes say "stop" when they are writing poetry. The speaker responds by saying that they say "stop" because they need to take care of themselves. They need to rest, to eat, to sleep, and to take care of their physical and emotional needs. The speaker emphasizes that poetry is not just a mental exercise, but a physical one as well. Writing poetry requires energy, focus, and emotional labor. It is not something that can be done without taking care of oneself.
The speaker then goes on to describe the creative process. They say that writing poetry is like "digging a hole in the ground." It is a slow and laborious process that requires patience and persistence. The speaker emphasizes that poetry is not something that can be rushed. It takes time to find the right words, to create the right rhythm, and to convey the right emotions. The speaker also notes that writing poetry is not just about the end result, but about the process itself. It is about the joy of creating something new, of exploring new ideas, and of expressing oneself in a unique way.
The speaker then turns to the role of the poet in society. They say that poets are not just entertainers, but truth-tellers. Poets have the ability to see the world in a different way, to challenge the status quo, and to inspire change. The speaker notes that poets have always played an important role in society, from the ancient Greeks to the modern day. Poets have the ability to speak truth to power, to give voice to the voiceless, and to inspire people to action.
The speaker then returns to the theme of self-care. They say that poets need to take care of themselves in order to be effective. They need to rest, to eat, to sleep, and to take care of their physical and emotional needs. The speaker emphasizes that self-care is not selfish, but necessary. Poets cannot create great works of art if they are exhausted, hungry, or emotionally drained. Self-care is not just a luxury, but a necessity for anyone who wants to create something meaningful.
The poem ends with the speaker saying that they will continue to write poetry, but that they will also take care of themselves. They will say "stop" when they need to, and they will take the time to rest and recharge. The speaker emphasizes that poetry is not just a job, but a calling. It is something that they are passionate about, and something that they will continue to do for as long as they are able.
In conclusion, Marge Piercy's "Poetry You Ask Why Sometimes I Say Stop" is a powerful exploration of the creative process, the role of the poet in society, and the importance of self-care. This poem is a reminder that writing poetry is not just a mental exercise, but a physical one as well. It is a reminder that poets have always played an important role in society, and that they have the ability to inspire change. Most importantly, this poem is a reminder that self-care is not selfish, but necessary. Poets cannot create great works of art if they are exhausted, hungry, or emotionally drained. This poem is a timeless reminder that we all need to take care of ourselves in order to be effective in our creative pursuits.
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