| User | Mister Fizzle | | Topic | about haiku... | | Message | I read this article on the difficulties that come with trying to write a japanese form like haiku in english. It was pretty interesting so I thought I would post it here for all you aspiring haiku writers.
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N o t S e v e n t e e n
(English Language Haiku)
By: James Thompson
Seventeen . . . seventeen . . . seventeen: the words echo in the halls striking fear in the hearts of haiku students and sensei alike. Poets are assailed by well meaning fans and critics chanting the haiku mantra: "five-seven-five". With every poem, haiku poets are presented with the opportunity (or cursed with the responsibility) to explain their art form. Of the many conceptions and misconceptions about haiku, the one most often discussed is the syllable count.
Webster’s New Collegiate Dictionary (1980), defines haiku as: "an unrhymed Japanese verse form of 3 lines containing 5,7, and 5 syllables respectively." Wow, that is like trying to use a tiny bonsai as an example of a giant redwood tree. It took R.H. Blyth four volumes to describe haiku and two more to discuss its history. I will touch briefly on two elements outlined in the Webster definition: the syllable count and the amount of lines in haiku.
Jack Kerouac, who helped popularize haiku in America with his book The Dharma Bums (1958), provided a much different definition outlining the vast differences in Western Language and Japanese. In Scattered Poems (1970), a posthumous collection of Kerouac’s poems, he stated: "A ’Western Haiku’ need not concern itself with seventeen syllables since Western Languages cannot adapt themselves to the fluid syllabic Japanese. I propose that the ’Western Haiku’ simply say a lot in three short lines in any Western Language." While this approach to haiku may not address all the elements of haiku, Kerouac’s haiku are widely anthologized in haiku collections.
In Haiku in English (1967) Harold G. Henderson states: "As a general rule a classical Japanese haiku: 1. consists of 17 Japanese syllables (5-7-5) 2. contains at least some reference to nature (other than human nature) 3. refers to a particular event (i.e., not a generalization) 4. presents that event as happening now- not in the past." He continues: "Japanese haiku ’syllables’ used for the 5-7-5 count are not English syllables. They are rather units of duration." The vast difference between the Japanese and English languages creates the confusion regarding the haiku ’syllables’. While English words are broken into syllables, the Japanese words are broken into onji (sound-symbols). Japanese onji are much shorter than English syllables (i.e. the single syllable English word "ran" breaks down into 2 Japanese onji, and the word "rain" breaks into 3 onji). Cor van den Heuvel, in the preface to The haiku Anthology, Expanded Edition (1999), details how this difference affects English Language haiku:"It is now known that about 12 - not 17 - syllables in English are equivalent in length to the 17 onji (sound- symbols) of the Japanese haiku."
The comparison of English syllables to Japanese onji is not exact, in fact, Cor van den Heuvel describes haiku as: "... a short poem recording the essence of a moment keenly perceived in which nature is linked to human nature. A haiku can be anywhere from a few to 17 syllables, rarely more." And what dictates how many syllables you use? Simply the nature and language of your poem. In a poem about his brother, who was killed in The Vietnam War, Nicholas Virgilio wrote:
Lily:
out of the water . . .
out of itself.
(Nicholas Virgilio)
He used eleven syllables in this beautiful haiku, which won a first place in the American Haiku and Japan Air Lines haiku contest in 1963 (out of over 41,000 English Language haiku submitted). Another haiku: "In a Station of the Metro" by Ezra Pound, considered by some to be the best English Language haiku ever written, diverts from 17 syllables:
The apparition of these faces in the crowd;
Petals on a wet, black bough.
(Ezra Pound)
Nineteen syllables! But, also notice that there are only two lines in this haiku. Many Japanese haiku were written as one-line poems (written vertically). These poems when typeset horizontally are sometimes presented in the one-line form, other times they are presented in a three-line form. Generally, while the three-line form is the most widely selected, one-line, two-line and even four-line forms are acceptable, provided the language and content of the poem support the line breaks. Another example of a successful departure from a three line haiku is Takayangi Shigenobu’s haiku, which is basically a concrete haiku:
in a mountain range’s
creases
hear
ing
clear
ly
the
bur
ied
ear
s
(Takayangi Shgenobu)
Considering the language differences between Japanese and English, Webster’s definition of haiku is incomplete at best. English Language haiku often diverges greatly from the syllable and line form described in the dictionary. In 1987, Cor van den Heuvel wrote in The New York Times Book Review: "A haiku is not just a pretty picture in three lines of 5-7-5 syllables each. In fact, most haiku in English are not written in 5-7-5 syllables at all--many are not even written in three lines. What distinguishes a haiku is concision, perception and awareness--not a set number of syllables."
Seventeen . . . seventeen . . . seventeen: the words fade into the distance. As outlined above, haiku is more than syllable and line counts, much more. Seasonal content (kigo), cutting words (kireji), and "nowness" are other very important elements of haiku. They will be discussed is future articles, in the meantime I close with perhaps the most famous, and most widely translated haiku:
the old pond
a frog jumps in
the sound of water
Matsuo Basho (1686)
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| User | magnicat | 2005-02-25 | | | Subject | untitled | | Message | i’m always open to learning something new, fiz. thanks for the info! |
| User | Mister Fizzle | 2005-02-22 | | | Subject | untitled | | Message | I know mag,
I felt the same way when I read it. The thing is, that poem is probably the most famous well-known haiku of all-time. So I started trying to learn more about haiku and what is really going on. I won’t go into details but it’s really alot like code to be honest. When you understand the codes the poems hold alot more significance.
For instance most haiku’s have a seasonal word (this is because the seasons are so distinct and well loved in japan) in that frog haiku, the word "frog" is a seasonal word that implies the spring, because frogs are most common in japan in the springtime.
An example of a seasonal word could even be something like "Drive-In" because drive-in’s are a direct relation to the summer time.
Many people consider this seasonal word the anchor or heart of the haiku and way more important than the 5-7-5 syllable pattern.
are you bored yet?
heh heh
peace,
mister fizzle |
| User | magnicat | 2005-02-20 | | | Subject | untitled | | Message | i’m sure that poem lost something in the translation and probably reads genius when read in japanese. i just know that it doesn’t do anything for me. |
| User | Mister Fizzle | 2005-02-19 | | | Subject | lost in translation | | Message | As it stands this haiku below by one of the 4 great masters of the form is just one of over 300 translations I have read of it. A simple little poem with that many translations. Hence it to say that people have struggled to capture the essence and the structure. What you read and get out of it is not how or what the author intended. Consider the connotation, metephor and irony or symbolism that will not breach the gap between cultures or languages. I bet most of you didn’t know that a haiku in japanese is a one line vertical poem. The three line form that we see today is a result of translation and westernization. I am not trying to be a know it all I only learned of these things in like the last week.
the old pond
a frog jumps in
the sound of water
Matsuo Basho (1686)
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| User | Mister Fizzle | 2005-02-19 | | | Subject | we need edit in here | | Message | nope thats bastardized too. Alot of experts say that a true translation of the 17 "onji" japanese haiku is closer to around 12 english syllables. |
| User | Mister Fizzle | 2005-02-19 | | | Subject | read the article | | Message | nope thats bastardized too. Alot of experts say that a true translation of the 17 "oji" japanese haiku is closer to around 12 english syllables. |
| User | Mister Fizzle | 2005-02-19 | | | Subject | untitled | | Message | nope thats bastardized too. Alot of experts say that a true translation of the 17 "oji" japanese haiku is closer to around 12 english syllables. |
| User | magnicat | 2005-02-18 | | | Subject | untitled | | Message | what i mean is it could be 4-6-7 or 5-8-4, like that. 17 total. |
| User | magnicat | 2005-02-18 | | | Subject | untitled | | Message | yeah, it is perfectly okay to write a haiku in english that doesn’t stick to the 5-7-5 format, although it should always stick to the 17 syllables in toto. |
| User | Mister Fizzle | 2005-02-18 | | | Subject | untitled | | Message | did you guys get the bit in the article about how writing haiku’s in english is difficult because of the syllables used not translating well from the japanese "onji" or (sound-syllable). Basically the 5 - 7 - 5 english haiku is a totally bastardized version of what the Japanese inteded for the form. The flow is lost and many would say that the spirit is lost as well.
I tend to agree.
peace,
mister fizzle |
| User | magnicat | 2005-02-18 | | | Subject | untitled | | Message | yeah, the one at the end by Basho, it didn’t do much for me. i don’t see the brilliance there. did i miss something or am i being obtuse? haikus aren’t very easy to write. i’ve tried writing a few, but they always seem lacking to me. |
| User | joeyalphabet | 2005-02-17 | | | Subject | untitled | | Message | interesting...all the haiku that were quoted were terrific. oh, to be able to write like that... |
| User | besodemuerte | 2005-02-16 | | | Subject | untitled | | Message | ...wow... i’ve been wondering for a while about the haiku thing... thanks |
| User | Mister Fizzle | 2005-02-16 | | | Subject | untitled | | Message | I found this article pretty fascinating and it really helped me understand why when I read most haiku’s I fail to see the brilliance. Something probably got lost in the translation. |
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