|| Replies ||

User	Maki | 2004-09-25 |
Subject	untitled
Message	^^ thanks, usually i get something like, this doesn’t work, but i am glad that you are inspired!!

User	Maki | 2004-09-16 |
Subject	^^ zanku all
Message	Yea.. maybe. i’d like some more comments pweaze?

User	lili | 2004-09-09 |
Subject	feedback okay
Message	well first off i think you split the fisrt and second stanza a little funny if you deside not to try and re work the lines maybe spliting the stanzas a little diffrent would help the flow a little. her is a suggestion for stanza wise and remember this is my opinion. good luck lia Death has its hands on my heart My simple soul is falling apart Sweet eyes don’t fail me now Give me more time to allow Me to tell you all my secrets true That were kept from you That could never be thought as had And gave no idea could be so bad But my head kept so many ideas There is nothing that could free us As the night grows even darker With each and every marker Of my new and falling life Putting up with so much more strife And not knowing whom to turn to Whom to call and talk with words so few For my mind is cluttered and occupied Struggling with each and every time you lied That made this and now me so weak Death is at my throat at fixing to tweak My downfall into something unheard of.

User	Mister Fizzle | 2004-09-07 |
Subject	untitled
Message	Trust Company has a pretty popular song called Downfall. This name kind of put that song in my head.