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    dotsJournal: dots
    Mood: The Usual

    sometimes i think too much and my thoughts have nowhere to go. even though i have people who claim things how theyd always be there for me and what not i dont feel comfortable sharing my thoughts, my dreams, my fears with anyone. and the few times i try i notice how no one listens or they downplay my emotions.

    it doesnt bother me as it once did. i know im a loner and i cant expect people to listen to me or anything. relying on others is a weakness. i have myself and only myself.

    i like it this way. Sometimes....

    ...Created 2013-09-23 00:19:43

    dotsJournal: dots
    Mood: The Usual

    I remember when poetry was my passion. Such a way with words I had. I guess I still have a way with them; able to portray my emotions well. But by all means, I don't know how I do it.

    Perhaps it's part of my too much thinking problem.
    I really need a drink. Can't wait to open that bottle of red wine tomorrow. Never had red wine before.

    they say it's good for your heart

    ...Created 2011-11-17 22:21:29

    dotsJournal: dots
    Mood: The Usual

    It's been some time now, but I think I'll try to do something more. I get sick and tired of waiting here anyway. And people...they're so annoying >.<

    ...Created 2011-10-25 22:47:51

    dotsJournal: Because I knowdots
    Mood: The Usual

    Have you ever wondered how much a person breaks for every lie you tell them? Every wasted effort, every wasted second to get closer to you; we know it amounts to nothing, but did you ever stop to think...

    Maybe he won't be able to live without you?

    But now, in a matter of moments, you move on, and leave him behind. Leaving me behind.

    I won't break on you; Everyone deserves to be happy, right? I wouldn't wish to take that away from you; but a promise is a promise, right?

    But promises will never be enough.

    I could scream, I could bleed, I could downright die and it wouldn't change our fate. It wouldn't change the fact that You're gone, I'm here, with nothing but a broken promise left.

    And what do I have left but a single photograph? And dreams of a day that will never come. Dreams that so easily turn to nightmares, that so easily carve into my soul and rip it apart.

    It's so easy to say time turned against us? And just like everything else, time ripped us apart after all.

    But why is it every time, regardless of how "close" I can get to a person, once they fall for someone else I'm so easily discarded?



    Perhaps that's the way we humans are; we so easily discard those "close" to us for the sake of a dream. But what if that dream doesn't manifest? What if that dream doesn't last? I won't wish you hell, for I can never do that. But I would have loved to have remained friends; to see things through. To see The better in you.

    But a demon can never be next to an angel, as those who surround themselves with darkness can never really bear witness to the light. We were two different kinds; and even though I can never discard you, time played it's hand.

    And now you're gone. and all I'm left with is your bleeding name on my skin.

    I write this hear, for I know you'll never read it. I was never worth a glance of your time, a roll of your eyes.

    No. We were never close in the end. Because if we were, I wouldn't have been discarded. I wouldn't have been thrown away the way I was, forgotten the way I was, ignored the way I have been, resented the way I am. No, none of that would have ever happened.

    ...Created 2010-09-06 18:20:51

    dotsJournal: dots
    Mood: The Usual

    ...Created 2010-07-12 19:32:26

    dotsJournal: dots
    Mood: The Usual

    Oooooh. Yeah. Oh.

    The morning sky was left behind
    No memories to find,
    of you. You.

    No matter where I looked
    I couldn't find a trace
    No, not even the mighty sky
    Could fill the hole you left behind

    Couldn't you have stayed?
    Kept this morning calm?
    Shield from this light
    Made everything alright?
    Couldn't you have felt
    This love one more time?
    Couldn't you have said
    Just one more little lie
    You wouldn't have to say a thing
    just you would make everything okay.

    So will you please, come back to my side?
    And make everything alright.
    We won't have to talk
    Just stay by my side.

    "It was a bitter feeling when you left."
    "I promise you I won't leave"
    "that's what you said the first time"

    I never thought I'd miss you this much
    Didn't think you'd feel so far away.
    Didn't think I'd feel so betrayed
    And I didn't think I'd feel so ashamed
    To have forgiven you so easily
    Without giving a second though
    I just wanted you here
    and now I'm tearing inside
    Did you ever stop to think?
    Did you ever stop to promise?
    Did you ever stop to feel?
    Did you ever stop to promise?

    But this light distracts my stare
    It makes everything disappear

    But you're not here
    But you're memory is.
    And as long as you are here with me again,
    I feel safe and calm
    Never leave my side, again.

    ...Created 2010-07-03 18:55:02

    dotsJournal: dots
    Mood: The Usual

    ...Created 2010-07-03 18:52:10

    dotsJournal: heh.dots
    Mood: The Usual

    Can you feel the hatred burning through my veins? Destroying all that I once was. Reconstructing something more complete..

    Sometimes we're forced to change ourselves to survive. Social-Darwinism? In a way.

    Regardless; I'm Dark Dann, supreme overlord of the galaxy. In a way. Perhaps too self-proclaimed? Once you witness my wrath and anger, you'd learn what hell is really like.

    Let the doomsday begin today!

    ...Created 2010-06-30 14:04:21

    dotsJournal: I want...dots
    Mood: The Usual

    I want to break this chain, this repeat, this cycle that leads only to nightmares and self-hate. I can't deny it, I've changed. And I continue to change; but to what I'm not sure anymore. I become engulf in negative feelings, allow the hate to rule me. Is there a better way to survive?

    Fragile isn't close to describe how I feel. It's no longer a feeling anymore, I just want the escape, the release. But I'm stronger than this, aren't I?

    Even now, I lie and manipulate, forcing others to be there for me when I should really be..alone.

    I know how you feel, I've been there before. A light that comes into your life to save you, and you hold on even when it's gone. I know the pain, the suffering that comes knowing it'll never be yours again. Your mercy is, that it wasn't years long as I, and that the shadow of it remains. For me there was nothing left.

    But you know, even though I know how it hurts...I never felt such pain before as hearing you cry over him.

    ...Created 2010-05-26 14:44:53

    dotsJournal: dots
    Mood: The Usual

    I'm alive. Is that surprising? When I was once lost in the valley of the dead, I have now conquored. There is no lesson here, yet so many are taught. Get out and live. And find what you have always saught :)

    ...Created 2010-05-25 15:57:04

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




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