Mood: Thinking...GAH! I'm thinking too much about this story i'm writing! i think i'm going to go insane, lol. it's gonna be good, i'm tellin' ya, lol. i get giggly when i'm tired, lol. okay, i need to shut up!...Created 2006-05-29 20:59:52
Mood: Sniffle...*sigh* My mom and dad split up. It doesn't surprise me...it's just...It happened way to fast. First my mom tells me, i'm going to leave soon. Then we leave in the next week. i thought we'd leave in 6 months or something!! It's just so hard to see dad heartbroken and mom just pretending to be happy when she's obviously not. And yesterday blowed. I had to pack. and if any of you ppl been though this then you know what it feels like! Well, i prolly will be on someday this week with one of my poems...yeap...see ya later.....Created 2006-02-20 17:21:27
Mood: KILL!!!I MUST KILL THE STUPID BITCH AT SCHOOL!! MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!! THE THRILL!! *ahem* i'm just kiddin'! lol. but i'd like to hurt someone extremely bad at school tho....hehehehe.......Created 2006-01-02 03:07:29
Journal: Life is Crazy -------------------------------------------
Mood: Thinking...Okay, has anyone wondered, why is life so freakin' crazy after you get older and as you know more and more??? Has anyone? Well, I have. And life is crazy, and we just can't stop it. And have you felt like you were just lookin' for something, but you don't know what it is? Well, I feel like i'm lookin' for something but I know what it is, and yet I don't. I feel like a huge part of my life was just cut out, or a huge part of my family's past has been cut out and no one wants to tell me anything and i feel like i'm going in huge circles and then i think all my sanity is lost. But really, if you really look, i think everyone is lookin' for something. I know i sound like a stoned hippie with my head stuck in the clouds...or pot smoke...but that's not the point.
Life to me is like one huge mystery, or one huge destiny waiting to happen. Yes, i believe in fate, and yet i believe if you want something so bad, you can get it. And i believe that even tho the worst things may happen to you, you'll look at all the great things you have that might not be much, and if you have faith and hope in yourself, something out of this world that's gonna be great will happen to you.
Here's another life mystery, why does the greatest ppl you know, have the worst things happen to them, and they become so damn paranoid of losing something they love so much, that the fear almost possesses them to where they almost do lose it? You'd think all these questions of mine would be so easy to answer but they're not obviously. And you all prolly think i'm going nuts but i'm not. Actually, i think i have a lot of bravery just coming out and saying all these crazy things. lol.
I mean, doesn't anyone REALLY stop and think about what, how, or why life itself is so crazy. And ppl say you (some ppl say it's me that causes the drama, but no, i don't, so choke yourself with a f*cking piece of cake) cause the drama. Well, in some cases, yes. But sometimes the drama comes to you in so many kinds of ways that it's like on huge f*cking lesson that we all fear and it's just insane.
Has ANYONE if thought about what is life going to bring them? or what you want to be brought to you? and don't be stupid and say, yeah, i want Eminem to come and f*ck me doggy style. I mean really? And as we get older we lose trust in so many ppl that you don't even know where to turn to go to in the end. Does this make any sense to anyone?
I'm just curious. And if anyone has a problem with it, then they don't know who they are....Well, now that i have all that off my chest i think i'll go now.......Created 2006-01-01 19:33:23
Mood: Yeay!!I feel very happy right now. Let me start from the beginning. I made a copy of my poem ~Through And Through and showed it to my friend cuz she's into poetry too. I told her it was about my boyfriend. She asked if she could keep it, i said yeah. Well her and my boyfriend are in the same Art class and she showed it to him to see if he would know and she said that he was smiling the whole time and said that it was prolly the best one i've ever written! yay! and then other ppl got curious and wanted to read it and before he gave the poem for someone else to read he had a huge grin on his face and he's like "that's about me!" AWH! So that is why i'm happy! ...Created 2005-12-26 19:46:30
Mood: Brain Friedgrr...this girl thinks i hate her and that i want to beat her up just cuz i give her dirty looks. The reason why i give her dirty looks is cuz she won't lay off my guy. But i'm over that, i was over that for a long time. Ppl have been sayin' that she doesn't like my guy no more but i can tell she does. Yet she wants me to beat her up just cuz i no longer react to all notes she writes on my guy's locker. and i wanna talk to her about it, just to straighten things out, but GRR! what if that just causes more crap? i've been thinking about this all day and i feel brain fried!...Created 2005-12-20 17:54:38
Mood: Sigh...Alright, i'm ok at the moment. But ever since I've loved this guy (i'm goin' out with him), I've cared about him SO MUCH that I cry 'cuz i know he cares back and i can actually FEEL it. I know i sound like a total lunitic, but it's true, and it's overwheming because i've never had someone care for me so much. or me care for someone so much in that matter. So now i'm all worried about the gayest things are going to happen becuz everything that has happened thats really GOOD always end up bad! Then i get all crying at shit and i really hate crying! *sigh* so now that i've got that all out, i think i'm good....maybe not. at least it's out. so if anyone actually read this, i'm sorry i wasted your time....Created 2005-07-26 19:50:40
Mood: Straightening things out...Wow, I am so tired that my brain literally feels like it's swirling! Crazy stuff! You know what? I'm going to attempt to write a HAPPY poem. Because all my poems seem all like "oh! woe on me!" and crap like that. And I'm really NOT like that in real life, honestly. But the reason why I write so depressed is so I won't have depression...you know what I mean? I can't explain it, it's to complicated for my brain to comprehend at this moment. *sigh* I just hope all you guys don't think i'm some kind of cry baby freak, 'cuz I don't cry unless I absolutely have too. Which is very rare. If you know what I mean, i'll prolly feel better, lol. alrighty, i'm done blabing about pretty much nothing. So next thing to check off my list is creating a HAPPY poem....this is gonna be a toughy.......Created 2005-07-01 22:18:18