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    dotsJournal: Updatedots
    Mood: Content

    Okay so here's the update on getting my autobiography published...I did hear back from the publisher and they are interested in publishing my book!!! This is great news, however, when I received the contract from them it said they want me to give them $1200 just to publish my book. Supposedly it is to get the initial publishing started, and I will get it back once 2500 copies have been sold...Yes, I want to get my autobiography published, but I'm not that desperate. When it's ready, and I submit it to the right publisher, they will pay ME to publish my book knowing they will make money off of it. So, getting my autobiography published is on the back burner for now. My boyfriend helped me with some research and we found out there are some things I'm missing for submitting my entire manuscript anyway, so it might be some time before that happens. I feel like I'm finally almost finished with it though so that's a start, haha. Here's to a hopeful future in the career of my dreams :)

    ...Created 2015-02-23 09:34:10

    dotsJournal: Autobiographydots
    Mood: Guess what!?

    So I've been working on my autobiography for 10 months. It'll be officially a year around mid April. I've been working hard on and off writing it (only because of the content being difficult for me to handle at times), and I have good news that I cannot quite comprehend. My editor, friend, and agent had sent the first chapter (I call them parts but they are definitely chapters) to a publisher to see if they would consider publishing my book. They called her about it and said they were interested but would like to read more before they make a decision. Well, I'm ecstatic! I can't believe all that hard work might be paying off. I have sent AJ (my editor) the first 4 updated parts of my autobiography and she has sent it to the publisher for consideration. I'm waiting impatiently for their response. AJ read it for me to make sure I didn't miss any mistakes before sending it off and she assures me that it's really good so I'm sitting here anxious as all hell waiting to hear if they are going to publish my book or not. I might be a published author soon! HOLY CRAP!!! I'm so excited. I'm not sure how long I can wait, haha. I wanted to share the good news, especially after the negative journal post...I have no doubt I'll be updating my journal the minute I hear from AJ about whether they will publish my book or not :)

    ...Created 2015-02-16 07:28:37

    dotsJournal: Hatedots
    Mood: Angry

    I have no idea what makes my mood swings so bad that no one on this earth can be here for me and support me. I get that it sucks I have mood swings, trust me I'm the one that has to deal with it, too. First hand. Apparently, I make my boyfriend feel terrible about himself when my lows get really low, like he did something wrong. I've told him over and over and over again that it's not his fault and there is nothing I can do about my mood. If I could just be happy I would but that's not what depression is about. He will never understand that. However, instead of just being compassionate and considerate when I'm in these moods, he makes it about him and how he feels terrible and says things like "Well, I don't want to be with someone with such huge mood sings." and "I don't want to be with you when you're like this." and all if does is just make me feel worse about myself. I try to reach out to friends but if the person I love and says loves me can't even handle me, how can anyone else? I've tried going to my friends for help but I just make them feel like shit too, so what the hell is wrong with me that makes everyone feel like shit when I just need some help??? God it makes me feel really alone and like I just shouldn't be around anyone if all I do is make people feel bad about themselves. I hate that he can't just be there for me like he promised me. I hate that it seems like he tries to just make me feel worse for making him feel bad about himself when I never even try to. I hate everything.

    ...Created 2015-02-05 07:43:13

    dotsJournal: Storiesdots
    Mood: Thinking...

    I'm not just a poetry writer...I'm sure I'm not the only writer who delves into other facets of writing, but I am particularly proud of the stories that I have been working on. Would anyone be interested if I posted chapters of my books or parts of my autobiography?

    ...Created 2015-01-11 19:53:03

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




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