Journal: The Secret -------------------------------------------
Mood: I won!Everything is possible!...Created 2008-02-23 17:31:21
Journal: Accepting me -------------------------------------------
Mood: The UsualI am gay, I am a lesbian, I am in love with a woman. I have always been attracted to women and there is nothing wrong with that, in fact nothing has ever felt so right. I was told for so long that there was somoething wrong with homosexuality and I tried for so long to not let people know and be like the majority-but i cant! And I am not sorry for that anymore!...Created 2008-01-23 00:07:48
Journal: Happy day ahead -------------------------------------------
Mood: Yeay!!I am happier than I have ever been and I vow never to make a decision that makes me sooo unhappy ever again!...Created 2008-01-16 18:42:45
Mood: RantWhy do we lie to ourselves? iS it because we cant bear the truth at the time or ever? Ive made such a mess and all because I cant be honest with myself let alone anyone else. I made a decsion that I thought was best for my daughter. I thought I was messing my life up because I fell in love with a woman & was messing my daughter up to. But the truth is no matter what I say..just as I never "loved" anyone like ebonys dad and i say that in a different way to i have never fallen in love with anyone the way i did sharee. i love her so much that i dont care about all the shit of the past or how much she fucks up i love her...even though i think im an idiot because it didnt turn out ...but love makes fools of us all and that only tells me that its the real thing...you know i had to wonder with my decisions if i had ever been in love..or if i ever loved...and i do i love my daughters father in a different way and have never felt about any other man the way i do him but thats because he is my daughters father and because i married him and he represents the life i expected and was taught to aspire to...but its not what i want...and now its not what my daughter wants...so im now in a position where i have to face the truth...im doing it for her and society and my unsupportive mother...i lied to myself...i lied to S about not wanting to be with a woman....and i made promises i cant keep...why do i have to please others....why does my mothers approval means so much at 34...i wish i could be honest with myself...i wish i didnt worry so much for my daughter...she is strong and i know that my sexuality will not hinder her but i cant help but be scared that it will....its still a cruel world...i dont want my choices to affect my daughter...but i should be happy or she wont be...
where do you draw the line...
sorry for my rant...
...Created 2008-01-07 08:24:07
Mood: The UsualPlease check out pizzolopoetry (ES user) I created an account on behalf of a young Australian poet lost to suicide-Paul Pizzolo. Please leave comments on poetry...even though paul isn't here to read them Pauls dad will appreciate them greatly. Thanks Heaps!...Created 2007-11-21 14:02:11
Mood: RelaxingI am out of hand as it has been a very long time since ive written anything, so please forgive my attempts atm...it feels good to be writing and submitting again though...thanks for your patience LOL ...Created 2007-09-03 22:03:52
Journal: Starting over -------------------------------------------
Mood: TiredNew begginings can be so scary yet very exciting......Created 2006-03-26 19:13:08
Journal: Happy New Year -------------------------------------------
Mood: RelaxingI apologise to anyone i forgot to thank recently...the past month has been a blur...things seem to be getting better and i guess im still hoping/relying on love getting us through it all...HAPPY NEW YEAR to all!!...Created 2005-12-28 17:49:13
Mood: Overwhelmedwhat can i say im exhausted and feel defeated...Created 2005-11-24 18:02:37
Journal: On top of the.. -------------------------------------------
Mood: In LoveAm on top of the world....everything is coming together for the ceremony and things are more than wonderful with my partner and i and my daughter is happier than she has been ...even though she is still struggling with becoming a 'big girl' having to go to school next year and not be with mummy LOL...Created 2005-10-27 21:08:47