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Roleplay | Viral news today | Music Theory

Astair

Name: Astair
ASL: 19/F/USA
Bio: [ Quick Bio ]
Website:[ Website ]
Days Away: 5483
Life Story: Fun
[ Ignore User ]

Favorites: 2
Forum Posts: 7
Shoutbox Posts: 5
RP Posts: 0
Signup Date: 5589 D
15.31 Years 1.53 Quote:
"I'm sick of your insane demands. When can I go into the supermarket and buy what I want with my good looks?" - Alan Ginsberg

Recent Favorites:

The Spin and Sway by LucyDiamond

Just Some British Humor by Azuire
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Featured:

Lies ... Edited Again

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Currently Stalking: azuire

Red, Red Wine

Mood: The Usual

Red wine makes my sorrows go away.

...Created 2008-03-28 10:25:48 [ View Past Journals ]

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Last 20 Submissions dots

Featured: Lies ... Edited Again

Lies ... Edited Again
:|| V: 1157 | C: 0 ||:
::Longing : Class : Prose :

Lies - Rewrite
:|| V: 1077 | C: 0 ||:
::Satire : Class : Prose :

Lies
:|| V: 1091 | C: 1 ||:
::Satire : Class : Prose :

Sail With Me
:|| V: 935 | C: 2 ||:
::Misc : Class : Poetry :

Death Sentence
:|| V: 1072 | C: 1 ||:
::Serious : Class : Poetry :

Machines
:|| V: 952 | C: 0 ||:
::Misc : Class : Prose :

Hilarity of Innocence
:|| V: 983 | C: 1 ||:
::Satire : Class : Prose :

Forgive
:|| V: 1061 | C: 1 ||:
::Friendship : Class : Prose :

Sleep Deprivation
:|| V: 1162 | C: 2 ||:
::Satire : Class : Prose :

Uncertainty
:|| V: 1065 | C: 1 ||:
::Passion : Class : Poetry :

Infection
:|| V: 898 | C: 1 ||:
::Love : Class : Prose :

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Messages

Your poetry is too...long. Try to pull your readers in before placing all of your attention on a mere story. Spending too much time thinking about what to write and rough drafts remove any interest or creativity that would have been possible. Keep trying.

| Posted on 2008-05-27 19:09:17 | by Logic - [ Reply to This ] -

Thanks for reading the keeper of my heart....I know I use a few cliché's in there but it seems that there are times when "Love" really is a big cliché's and I knew no other way to put it.........lol

| Posted on 2007-12-23 23:42:45 | by aNNmARIE - [ Reply to This ] -

Thanks for the comment! I read your work and I think it's amazing! I've added you to my stalk list <3

much love
britt

| Posted on 2007-12-19 12:26:58 | by CaughtRedhanded - [ Reply to This ] -

I appreciate your input.

The second half was sorta added on a whim, and wasn't meant to flow or fit with the first part. I just wanted to write it out as one sentence, but then decided to break it up.

| Posted on 2007-12-18 20:16:38 | by Inkybro - [ Reply to This ] -

Thanks so much for a comment :) I agree with you about adding more to the last section, but I also agree that it would ruin the last statement. I sat there for about an hour wracking my brain for a way to make it longer but I always went back to that statement.

| Posted on 2007-12-18 19:21:19 | by wovenwords - [ Reply to This ] -

Hello, Chelle. Welcome to the ES community!

| Posted on 2007-12-17 18:56:29 | by ES Magazine - [ Reply to This ] -

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Astair

Red, Red Wine

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