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    poetry


    --Elite Writer
    Alias: Astair
    Name: Astair
    ASL: 19/F/USA
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    Recent Favorites:
    The Spin and Sway by LucyDiamond
    Just Some British Humor by Azuire
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    Featured:
    Lies ... Edited Again



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    Currently Stalking: azuire

    Journal: Red, Red Wine
    -------------------------------------------
    Mood: The Usual
      
    Red wine makes my sorrows go away.


    ...Created 2008-03-28 10:25:48     [ View Past Journals ]

    [ View as Blog ]

    dotsLast 20 Submissionsdots

    Featured: Lies ... Edited Again

     Featured workLies ... Edited Again
    :|| V: 586 | C: 0 ||:
    ::Longing : Class : Prose :
     Lies - Rewrite
    :|| V: 581 | C: 0 ||:
    ::Satire : Class : Prose :
     Lies
    :|| V: 757 | C: 1 ||:
    ::Satire : Class : Prose :
     Sail With Me
    :|| V: 632 | C: 2 ||:
    ::Misc : Class : Poetry :
     Death Sentence
    :|| V: 751 | C: 1 ||:
    ::Serious : Class : Poetry :
     Machines
    :|| V: 634 | C: 0 ||:
    ::Misc : Class : Prose :
     Hilarity of Innocence
    :|| V: 674 | C: 1 ||:
    ::Satire : Class : Prose :
     Forgive
    :|| V: 671 | C: 1 ||:
    ::Friendship : Class : Prose :
     Sleep Deprivation
    :|| V: 772 | C: 2 ||:
    ::Satire : Class : Prose :
     Uncertainty
    :|| V: 682 | C: 1 ||:
    ::Passion : Class : Poetry :
     Infection
    :|| V: 566 | C: 1 ||:
    ::Love : Class : Prose :
    List All...





    ||| Messages |||
      
    Your poetry is too...long. Try to pull your readers in before placing all of your attention on a mere story. Spending too much time thinking about what to write and rough drafts remove any interest or creativity that would have been possible. Keep trying.
    | Posted on 2008-05-27 19:09:17 | by Logic - [ Reply to This ] -
      
    Thanks for reading the keeper of my heart....I know I use a few cliché's in there but it seems that there are times when "Love" really is a big cliché's and I knew no other way to put it.........lol
    | Posted on 2007-12-23 23:42:45 | by aNNmARIE - [ Reply to This ] -
      
    Thanks for the comment! I read your work and I think it's amazing! I've added you to my stalk list <3

    much love
    britt
    | Posted on 2007-12-19 12:26:58 | by CaughtRedhanded - [ Reply to This ] -
      
    I appreciate your input.

    The second half was sorta added on a whim, and wasn't meant to flow or fit with the first part. I just wanted to write it out as one sentence, but then decided to break it up.
    | Posted on 2007-12-18 20:16:38 | by Inkybro - [ Reply to This ] -
      
    Thanks so much for a comment :) I agree with you about adding more to the last section, but I also agree that it would ruin the last statement. I sat there for about an hour wracking my brain for a way to make it longer but I always went back to that statement.
    | Posted on 2007-12-18 19:21:19 | by wovenwords - [ Reply to This ] -
      
    Hello, Chelle. Welcome to the ES community!
    | Posted on 2007-12-17 18:56:29 | by ES Magazine - [ Reply to This ] -



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    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

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