--Elite Writer Alias: Brwnsknsam05 Name: Miciala Mobstricka ASL: 32/F/ Cuba Bio: [ Quick Bio ] Website:[ Education ] Days Away: 55 Life Story: OEF VET [ Ignore User ]
Favorites: 81 Forum Posts: 2 Shoutbox Posts: 61 RP Posts: 4 Signup Date: 4814 D 13.19 Years 1.32 Decades 160.47 Months 687.71 Weeks 4.814000e+8 Heart Beats -There you go eggman Quote: Why worry about tomorrow...worry for today for tomorrow worries for itself.
Journal: I Stand -------------------------------------------
Mood: The Usual
I stand up...
For all those that have lost their voice
I stand up...
For those that have met the end of a barrel
I stand up...
For those that came before me
I stand up...
I am not subhuman
I stand up, because I have shoulders to stand on
hey! I know what you mean about the JERK piece that I wrote. It seems to say that i know my destiny... as in knowing the future. It's actually meant to say that the things that have already happened in the past have driven us away. When years before, we had dreams and hopes of better things, yet life brings circumstances that are unfortunate and the outcome that is unwanted. thank you for taking the time to read my most recent work and share in my emotions.
Im doing really good! Just recently met someone important. :D im working in fort bliss in El paso, TX. ive been here about a year after coming back from Iraq. I was going to school for business but it got hectic and just taking a break for now. Where u at now? still in the military?
Thanks for your lovely comment on "her seashell lungs" I love describing people its really fun especially when its somebody who think they are dull because I like to take that dullness and turn it into a sparkling diamond ;)
Where is your door??? Ive lost my way.
just found a note, on my doorstep.
I read and read what we once shared.
Im lost in words, just sit and stare.
Can't find the way to say hello,
the perfect words to let you know...
That you were always in my mind
no matter what place or how late in time.
Take this as sign that I'm still real
so full of passion left to feel.
Come on over and spend the night...
an endless fantasy we have yet to write.
First off, I want to apologize again for coming off the way I did during my last critique of your work. If you look at the critiques I typically give, I think you'll see that I am usually very supportive, and sensitive to a poet's attachment to their "creations". I was not that way with you. I was condescending and rude. I have no excuse for that. I am sorry.
One of my favorite poets, Mary Oliver wrote a book that combined her poetry with her late lover's photography. It is titled, "Our World". On the back of her book there is a quote, "Attention without feeling, I began to learn, is only a report. An openness--an empathy--was necessary if the attention was to matter."
Within all my ranting, that was the message I was most trying to convey to you. I saw the beginnings of something really bold and interesting in your writing and I was eager to find more of that combined with deeper insights and feelings. I guess I threw a temper tantrum when I didn't get what I wanted.
While it's true that Oliver is a lesbian, what is more important is that she is a word wielder extraordinaire! Her poem "Wild Geese" illustrates what I've been trying to say to you about showing empathy, spirit and vulnerability (along with intimacy) in your writing. She has a wonderful and unique voice and her imagery is thoughtful and resonates with complexity and feeling. This is my favorite poem in the world (so far):
You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.
Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting—
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things. -Mary Oliver 1986
Here's a link to some of her other stuff: http://www.morning-earth.org/DE6103/POETRY/Mary%20Oliver%20Poems.pdf
You may already be familiar with this poem (it is quite famous) along with Oliver's other work. I don't mean to make assumptions. I guess I just wanted to share something inspirational rather than insulting with you.
We are both writers and we share this "space" on the internet, so I wanted to show you that I'm not just some mean-spirited bitch. While there was no method, and there was perhaps plenty of "madness" in my previous communication with you, I truly wish you the best.
Again, I'm sorry for my failure to convey my feelings in a more respectful way.