--Elite Writer Alias: Draigon Name: Martin Webb ASL: 25/m/Al Bio: [ Quick Bio ] Website:[ Website ] Blog:[ Blog ] Days Away: 2214 Life Story: Best left unknown [ Ignore User ]
Favorites: 26 Forum Posts: 0 Shoutbox Posts: 37 RP Posts: 0 Signup Date: 5473 D 14.99 Years 1.5 Decades 182.43 Months 781.86 Weeks 5.473000e+8 Heart Beats -There you go eggman Quote: Silence is the most perfect expression of scorn. -George Bernard Shaw
I'm really sorry to hear about your daughter :( she'll be in my thoughts.
Things have been very hectic for me. Family is going through a very rough time financially and the parents have been fighting a lot lately. I think it's time for me to find somewhere else I can stay, especially now since I'm 18.
I'm actually thinking about coming back here to Elite Skills. I moved to a site called Mibba, but there's too much drama there. Is this site still alive?
And just another bit of advice for you to consider when writing: Some people think that all poetry has is rhyme. But that is not true. It needs all the feelings stick inside of you dying to cry out and let themselves know.
That would be my first step to improving your work, forget rhyme, at least for a while until you get the feel for emotion, and then maybe you can add it back.
And secondly, try to tell a story, or at least have a point. I know the sorrow under your last piece was the main idea, but i still after going back did not see a defining line leading to that.
Try it if it interests you. I would be glad to read any of your work that you try this on and advise you further.
Keep your head up. Life always sucks,
But it'll get better, it just takes time and distrations. i know how it feels to want to forget, just so it heals, but you cannot forget for the sake of your memories and the pieces of you that will die along with the fading memories.
It really does get better, But it never goes away completely.
Look, honestly if I could get rid of all the malice I have for the likes of you at the moment and call a spade a spade:
Going back to your nationalist ideals.
You have none, judging by your write, of which there is nothing else to judge, you sound like a 14 year old making a terrible speech which says nothing about nationalism in the slightest save for the definition:
nationalism is pride in ones country
and:
People shouldnt be terrified of their government.
WTF?
Tell us something we dont know!
How scholarly was your argument?
If someone wants to get all political they should at least find something valid to say.
Im not attacking nationalism, Im attacking you for sounding like a simpleton.
If you show that little rant to anyone with a degree in ENGLISH then they would tell you straight up its ridiculous high school trash.
You didnt even give any facts.
as for "you wont own anyone at poetry",
I can honestly tell you that yours is laughable. Id comment but it would only be a further waste of my time.