--Elite Writer Alias: Fougene Name: Wayne Liu ASL: 17/m/Saskatoon Canada Website:[ Website ] Days Away: 4269 Life Story: what life? [ Ignore User ]
Favorites: 8 Forum Posts: 8 Shoutbox Posts: 0 RP Posts: 0 Signup Date: 4856 D 13.3 Years 1.33 Decades 161.87 Months 693.71 Weeks 4.856000e+8 Heart Beats -There you go eggman Quote: "The only reason why worry kills more than work is because more people worry than work."
Thanks for comment on goldfish poem but you know, I already know it's OK in fact I love it to bits. Need to get criticism or at least hear details about why a reader is pleased. You gave a "generic" comment which is very kind but a waste of time.
Your comment about "Dawn and Midnight Kissed" is well taken. I put "her God" to draw attention to the fact that it was not any of the Roman and Greek gods being referred to. We as Westerners familiar with the Incarnation know which god is being referred to, but to those unfamiliar with the scene of That Night will see that "her god" was not any of the mythical gods upon research by either text or by word of one familiar with. I hope this makes for better reading and understanding.
First, I would like to wish you and family a Happy Thanksgiving Holiday Season!
Are you suggesting that I go with the original poem which is the following:
Joy comes in the mourning, and you color me true You coloured me red, and you coloured me blue Crimson red sunset reflects in indigo eyes Orange blossoms planted in soft maple hair Lavender sky dancing on sugar plum clouds Olive green corn stalks resting on a Kansas farm Curious black crows wake a wan scarecrow Ruby red slippers click drag me kicking home If you colour me bright, and you colour me bold Paint me some new colours, love, just green and gold
Should I scrap it and start over again? The original ideas comes from the story titled, Wizard of Oz