--Elite Writer Alias: jessie thomas Name: Jessie Thomas Flippo ASL: 24/F/Alabama Bio: [ Quick Bio ] Website:[ Education ] Days Away: 915 Life Story: Love life [ Ignore User ]
Favorites: 81 Forum Posts: 13 Shoutbox Posts: 12 RP Posts: 0 Signup Date: 5019 D 13.75 Years 1.38 Decades 167.3 Months 717 Weeks 5.019000e+8 Heart Beats -There you go eggman Quote: "Raising a child is like taking care of someone who's on way too many shrooms, while you are on a moderate amount. I am not confident in my decisions, but I know you shouldn't be eating a mouse pad."
So it has been about six years since I have posted a journal entry.. Or really since I have frequented this website at all. I check in every now and again but I haven't submitted anything in a very long time. (Not that I imagine anyone except for Jaz is reading this lol) In the short version: I graduated and moved in with a man nineteen years my senior. We were together for four years. Two of them good. The relationship came to an end after about a year of mental and emotional abuse that finally became physical. After he broke my nose and gave me a black eye, I left. I was more lost and ashamed than I ever thought I could be. I reconnected with an old friend who became more of a lover. We were determined to keep our relationship friendly and physical with no emotional ties. He slowly helped me to see that I have the power to be exactly who I want to be and that I can be accepted and appreciated for that. A year and a half later we were married. We had a beautiful wedding with a proper and traditional ceremony and a silly (all-be-it scourching) reception that fulfilled every dream I never even knew I had on the subject. Shortly after we stated trying to get pregnant. It took four months and I realized we had been successful. I knew before I even took the test. Nine months later (really like seven but you know..) I was laying in bed and my water broke. We went to the hospital. My water broke again (cause that's how I do) and at 8:27 PM, 12 hours after my water broke, I got to meet my baby boy. Atlas Link Flippo. The last six months of being a mother have been the hardest of my life. It goes without saying, I feel, that I love him more than I knew I could. When he smiles at me it makes me happy in a way that I never knew existed.
When he was 6 weeks old I went back to work. I started working with family so I could bring him with me. So now I am working 45 hours a week in a job and a town that I hate. All of the worst, most horrible things that happened to me have happened in this town. I stopped breast feeding shortly after I started working. The combination of events sent me deep into post partum depression. After four months of trying to pull myself together I have finally been making changes that are making me feel better and happier. I am trying to reconnect with my passions: music and writing. So here I am.
Sorry... did I say short version?
I am only too glad to help a fellow mother and writer. People like us need to stick together. Women need each other... young and old, regardless of status in life. We have something incredibly valuable to offer each other that you can not buy; our experience and wisdom.
You have been through a lot, and it has left you with a whirlwind of emotion, but now you are taking the necessary steps to put yourself in a position to become the best version of you.
At the end of the day, when you feel your state of mind slipping into those dark places, tell yourself you are doing the best that you can to bring positivity to light. Try to rest there. It will not happen all in one day, especially when your life has changed so radically.
You will be better, you will make sure of it. Make no mistake, taking care of yourself is the best thing you can do for your family. But don't be afraid to ask for help from friends, from family, from your community. Keep the ones that lift you up and help you grow the closest.