|Journal: alleviate me|
-------------------------------------------Mood: in an abyss
Unfortunetly my life isn't 100% now. I'm a sophomore in a community college and work at a crazy house... I'm only 19 and have a 26 year old boyfriend who at the moment seems to think of me of nothing more that a nussence. Every one I've come into contact latly really don't care about my well being, education, happiness level... Even my boyfriend doesn't enjoy my conversations it seems. I'm pretty heart broken. He punched a cabinet in front of me and then had to be held back. from what. what was he going to do. he thought a sorry would fix everything, but it didn't and he continued to be mad at me because I didn't realize what I had done to deserve what he did. I've never been that afraid of him and I don't know what to do. I don't feel like writing because its right there for him to read. So I will type all of this and hope that he will never find out. I'm extremely depressed, and thank god it isn't affecting my school work. I'm a functional depressed person which is good I think. I need to be alone for a while. I don't think I'm ready to move out with him... I'm going to move my bed up to my moms and start staying there and working on a nice bedroom up there. I don't have a true home where I feel safe and I feel like I need one. His mom's house will no longer suffice. I'm sad and will remain that way until something happens , and I don't think its going to happen.
...Created 2007-10-24 17:17:34 [ View Past Journals ] [ View as Blog ]