i am so very sorry about your cousin. i understand loss and how heavy it can be, how its weight pulls you down. i have come to understand that we never truly stop grieving. we just learn to live with it better as time goes on.
i don't visit my cousins much because i always end up crying over my aunt (their mother). i know that is a stupid reason, and a horrible thing in itself because i love my cousins, it's just that it's so close sometimes and the pain always resurfaces.
someday maybe i'll come to terms.
was looking into that publishing thing. any suggestions?