Well, Elite Skills, it's been grand (and lately it's been grandly hell) but I think I'll sign off for good this time. This community's going to hell on three wheels and a broomstick, and while normally that would be quite the compliment, it's meant literally here.
LOL @ little junkie clan, oh yes... they are a ragga-muffin bunch, my friends... I had one that was drug-free, mind you, but he died... and they said HE was a "meth OD"...
"See, Jen, you don't seem to understand, when there's a rainy season, Farmers don't have a lot to do... that's what happened... He tried meth cuz he couldn't plow that week... THat's how it happens...."
OH! THAT is how it happens! I was CONFUSED! Yeah, I see that now... You're sitting around the house, it's raining, and suddenly [censored] your gf and cleaning your gun or making a Margarita with the blender is just SO blaise... You look at that rainy window-pane and say, "TODAY I am going to shoot METH for the first time, since there's NOTHING BETTER TO DO..." and wouldn't you know, it's always that FIRST TIME that kills you...!
It's easier to forgive a friend for saying something stupid to you while they're [censored]ed up, than it is to forgive a friend for saying something stupid to you with a clear head...
Therefore, I'm down to only making allowances for junkies and drunks. At least they had an excuse and possibly didn't mean it at the time...
Normal... that sounds scary. Are you buying polyester blends and sipping Starbucks too???
Oh god... My friends are out. I saw Cheeto yesterday, he showed up with E and John to take the boat out, leaving me to cook 5# of chicken and make chicken salad. (Splitting headache + sunlight left me immobile to do more than stir)
Supposedly, everything is "cool" again and C-boy is back in business with a tighter clientel (I dare not, I simply have every alarm going off and can't do it... buy, that is, altho I was cleaning up till the "gifties" started getting dropped off... I didn't get one today, and I'm kinda edgy and ready to beat something to death... I'm my usual self only un-drugged, and turning to my pharmaceutical mixes again to try to match a state of mind comparable to what I want... And NO, it's NOT working... and yeah, Heath Ledger is close in my mind as I try, so I'm not going all-out. You really can't trust a pharmaceutically FDA APPROVED drug anymore.
But, I've learned that Cheeto is really cool sober (I never knew, never experienced him in his right mind before), but I found that Rowf (aka Randy, but he vomits Wild Turkey so much, hence the nickname)... Rowf is NOT COOL sober, scary as hell in fact with this vibe that unnerved me and that is HARD to do. I requested E and Chee to NEVER bring him around me sober again, I don't like him at ALL and he's not the same person. They told me, why do you think he stays drunk??? and WillieJ and W/Heather are not hanging around anybody, blaming E and being a-holes, blaming everyone else but themselves. Personal Responsibility ain't their thing, how American.
The Moochers are not only OUT, but I went down and was cleaning the yard and house, getting madder by the minute when I think of all the b.s. stress I went through for them to sneak out during the night, and all the lies about their money being "lost in the mail"... then I got madder and decided, no more of THAT BS, if they think their mail is a great excuse, let's USE that... so I threw down my broom and ran out to the road and tried to tear the nailed-to-a-4X4 galvanize steel mailbox off the post it's perched on with 2 others, and couldn't get it off without the board and 2 other boxes, which got me in an argument with the neighbor across the road who's mailbox hit the ground... so I got a hammer and was going to beat it flat (along with the neighbor) when I realized, that is MY OWN mailbox, really... So, I instead got duct-taped and completed sealed it shut, which has everyone all up-in-the-ass about, YOU CANT DO THAT and I'm like, the [censored] I can't, WATCH ME DO IT!!! It's been sealed since the day they left, with a huge red EVICTED--RETURN TO POST OFFICE!!! on it. I am quite pleased that I found a way to hopefully ruin their days, cuz they drove to their "old place" daily for a month to collect their mail & harrass their last landlord. I'll be damned if I let them have a reason to come back... everything's gone now, keep driving WHEREVER. But, I got all the fencing and T-posts (stacked in my truck, cuz after tearing T-posts out of the ground, I've been too tired and lazy to remove them all... big work for a jonesing junkie-gone-cold-turkey, that will wait indefinitely. Brushing Teeth and Brushing Hair is hard enough.
Let's see, what else? Gosh, rivering is my only joy, besides of course burning out my eyes on the computer, my "window" to the outside world. I think I should paint the bedroom again or something jarring to get me going again. I don't want to get a job, applied several places on a whim (after seeing my checking account balance), and then I turned my phone off and went to bed. I'm afraid to see if I didn't get a call, and terrified I did.
I want to see Depp's ALICE movie, but I would have to leave the house and sit in a dark room with 50+ people I don't know for 2 hours, and that's not very appealing, even with 3-D glasses. Looks like NetFlicks is going to be hearing from me in a few months...
Have you been out in the world, seen any flicks, met anyone who was more than a lip-flapping meat puppet lately? If so, encourage me... I am thinking nothing is out there worth opening the door for anymore.
Oh, and someone figured out I'm "insane" in 5,000 words or less... and to think, I was convinced I was hiding it well.... shoulda known better.