Journal:
-------------------------------------------Mood: The Usual
but dear, things are more complex than what you think.
back then, i used to come only on alternate days but please, i didn't have money to splurge on expensive internet. yes, it used to be costly and my father paid the bills. it was nothing for him to afford but i am a self respecting adult.... but perhaps, you had some other thoughts.
once, i wrote a dreamy poem for you, my first one for you but it somehow ended up making you angry.
remember, when we were just friends, i went away for a while and then i started missing you despite i knew that there was "someone" you loved. I guess i heard you in my dreams. One night i couldn't sleep and got up to gaze at the beauty of nearly full moon. I used to identify the moon with you. {remember, your profile pic} and i so clearly heard an intense male voice calling my name. It wasn't my father or brother. They were sleeping in their rooms and i even replied, yes, i am coming. but then i checked, everybody was asleep and God! it scared me and i ran to my bed!!!
Later, i got this crazy idea that you were missing me and then i stealthily came to your page and found you were missing someone and the latest poem was about someone who had perhaps committed suicide.
slowly, i found this out.
i wrote that poem for you because i thought you have a heart that doesn't feel ashamed to cry... that people and circumstances had hurt you from time to time
but you perhaps guessed something else... something abominable about me.
The "other person" you hate so much is no one but you, yourself.
Because there is only one man whom my heart has chosen defying every other consideration and that is you.
...Created 2009-09-17 13:05:27 [ View Past Journals ] [ View as Blog ] |
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