--Elite Writer Alias: monad Name: Bruce ASL: 64/M/California Website:[ Website ] Days Away: 1 Life Story: [ Ignore User ]
Favorites: 44 Forum Posts: 0 Shoutbox Posts: 37 RP Posts: 0 Signup Date: 2942 D 8.06 Years 0.81 Decades 98.07 Months 420.29 Weeks 2.942000e+8 Heart Beats -There you go eggman Quote: If a man speaks in the forest, and there is no woman there to hear him, is he still wrong??
I hear you. It seems like everyone is dropping in my mother's generation (my father, her brother just had a quintuple bypass, my aunt has been bedridden for nearly 3 months, her father passed away) etc. It's been an experience watching her. It's not so much dying, but being at that point in your life where dying is no longer just an accident, you know?
No kids on my end, haha. I've been taking care of a child, like I mentioned, but he belongs to a big family of 5. It's really exposed me to the fact that I want children at some point in my life, and I'm almost decidedly going to adopt. Even if it's only one child alongside a biological one.
I've been laying off relationships, mostly because it's been a difficult bit, recently for me, emotionally and I just don't have the stomach for people's petty bullshit. Maybe I'm just a terrible apple picker too, though. Either way.
I'm actually taking this stuff called tianeptine. It's an opioid agonist (same concept as heroin basically), but in super small doses it doesn't exhibit that stuff. It's basically a tri-cyclic, haha. I think the biggest point of appeal is that it doesn't murder your libido -- which seems silly considering the above paragraph to care about, but oh well.
The undergrad is done, but at this point I think the two PhDs are in the wind. It's a combination of I've just never really cared for school, it's super expensive, and I'm okay with it not happening. I dreaded with time away from school I'd slowly stop reading books, thinking about it all, thinking at all etc., but it really hasn't changed. And considering how lacking dialogue has become in my friend circles, I find that a good thick book has become a necessary part of my diet. The attack on truth, as people call it, also won't be disappearing any time soon -- so likely no chance I'll forget about that. It's just a question of whether or not I can write a good decent book by the time I find myself where you are. Then a couple beers and a joint would definitely keep me going until I just about jump into my grave.
Sorry I didn't stop by sooner, a bit rude of me. How are things with you? I've been preoccupied pretending to be a therapist to a young child on the spectrum. It's made me feel surprisingly fulfilled, and hence kept me away from this place of laments.
Pulling at the threads of frayed humanity is what I mean. Whether we "survive" transition or not is a human construct. We are to raise our frequency (collectively) and shed these vibrating atoms to become exactly what we are. Essence.