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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Dead Shows With Hippy Jesusdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: LameMansTerms
    ASL Info:    36/M/Hermosa Beach, Ca
    Elite Ratio:    4.31 - 713/1012/165
    Words: 278
    Class/Type: Fanfic/
    Total Views: 1048
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1849



    Description:
       this isn't about structure more or less but the flow I had to it when it is recited--in fact you're all invited
    it's open mike night --I'm so excited--eh just have fun with it--dont give me bs about how wrong I am to say all these things--BECAUSE i AM gOD AND YOU ARE ALL MY CHILDREN AND i WANT TO LOVE YOU ALL--SO DONT PISS ME OFF!


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsDead Shows With Hippy Jesusdots
    -------------------------------------------


    What if Jesus wasn’t crucified?
    Instead he was shot,
    cause he tried
    to steal some killer Bethlehem Pot
    A drug dealer--maybe?
    A free spirited healer?
    Sent to save me?
    And he drove a Cadillac,
    not a nice one- but some beat up piece of crap
    With a bumper sticker on the back
    That said "King Of the Brews"
    What if …he wasn’t even a Jew?
    And dieing for us never was a gift?
    It was because he coveted his neighbor’s wife’s tits

    What if he was a chick? Is that O.K?
    Who was hooked on Frankincense and Mir?
    So, she sucked dick
    all freaking day.
    Friends couldn’t even make sense of what occured,
    and I probably woulda fucked her-
    then of course I cheated-
    and then got beat up by her mother.
    Her virgin Mother---
    Who was a hooker-
    And my lover-
    and a kick boxing champion—
    Hailing from The Holy Land
    Mary the Hippy Killer Magdalene.

    A Hippy ya can never trust,
    Nor did he die for us—
    He died cause he was a rat
    and spilled his guts
    about what went on,
    the night Matthew and Mark
    saw Luke stick it in John’s butt.
    It was nuts.
    It was done!
    This is now the Gospel according to no-one.

    What if Jesus went to Grateful Dead shows and sold patchouli....?
    And bong pokers
    to the young smokers?—
    And pimped out his hippy girlfriend named Julie?
    Never trust a hippy!

    The bible on trial….
    Hung-
    Like the Hymn
    he hummed to her-
    a prayer-
    a sheep herder
    a sheep fucker
    Trusting a hippy?
    long hair
    sandal wearer
    Never!

    lamemansterms




    Submitted on 2006-04-28 08:06:07     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    ||| Comments |||
      Wow. This is hilarious. So I gotta ask what exactly possessed you to write this, cuz I don't know how many people would have the balls to post something like this (I'm surprised you haven't gotten any angry comments on this - maybe those that would've figured it wouldn't be worth it).

    I've always thought of Jesus as a hippy. Not a carpenter. But on the other hand, I always thought Jesus was Black too. But that's another story for another day. Great job. ...bb...

    XoXo
    ~Tayla~
    | Posted on 2006-05-23 00:00:00 | by Phoenix2004 | [ Reply to This ]
      Oh man, you've got some classic lines in this

    Totally irreverant, I like stuff like this. I dunno, I think if people get offended by this they need to lighten up and see it for what it is... a poke in the ribs.

    This reminds me of Monty Python... it's very comical.

    Anyway, that's all I got for ya. I got my laugh
    Jase
    | Posted on 2006-04-28 00:00:00 | by alteredlife | [ Reply to This ]
      We need more people like you because you speak your mind and and you refuse to water it down like a pg-13 movie always does with an R rated one. It's funny...i found quite a few places actually made me laugh aloud...even though some of it made me feel guilty for doing so. But you don't hold back and you dont care what other people think about it. In addition, its always nice to see peoples thoughts down in typed format because there are some people that i have no clue what goes through their head.
    | Posted on 2006-04-28 00:00:00 | by norm | [ Reply to This ]
      ...and he would be singing "I Know You Rider" like you and I would. And he'd wait for that sax solo (...or maybe it was a guitar) and he would be banging his head 'til he hits a girl named Amy who was actually born Raymond with gender dysphoria. And he would [censored] her/him all night.

    Point is, we won't be there. And there were no such things as morphine, psychology and gender reassignment surgery when the first jew threw his first stone. What were there were the remnants of Greece's culture... and the charred clothing of feminist Atargatis worshipers who were probably burned at the steak for what they chose to believe in.

    It's a sad world.
    | Posted on 2006-04-28 00:00:00 | by ANGELO | [ Reply to This ]
      ...and he would be singing "I Know You Rider" like you and I would. And he'd wait for that sax solo (...or maybe it was a guitar) and he would be banging his head 'til he hits a girl named Amy who was actually born Raymond with gender dysphoria. And he would [censored] her/him all night.

    Point is, we won't be there. And there were no such things as morphine, psychology and gender reassignment surgery when the first jew threw his first stone. What was there were the remnants of Greece's culture... and the charred clothing of feminist Atargatis worshipers who were probably burned at the steak for what they chose to believe in.

    It's a sad world.
    | Posted on 2006-04-28 00:00:00 | by ANGELO | [ Reply to This ]


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