Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: The Silenced Poetdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Silenced poet
    ASL Info:    21/male/oregon
    Elite Ratio:    2.54 - 52/41/21
    Words: 112
    Class/Type: Poetry/Venting
    Total Views: 1381
    Average Vote:    3.8571
    Bytes: 721



    Description:
       rEAD IT AND JUDGE IT!!!!


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe Silenced Poetdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Silenced by my peers,
    i sit and i watch.
    Paper and pen,
    i jot down my thoughts.
    Murder and meham,
    love and deciet.
    In life im not normal,
    but in poems i bleed.
    Preppies they shun me,
    others ignore.
    To most of my friends,
    I'm a madman at war.
    in my eyes im normal,
    an enigma deep down.
    Only in a poem,
    can my emotions be found.

    But i need a name not my own,
    something to put on paprer.
    Other than anonymous,
    and sonds good in a scripture.
    Emotions running in my head,
    still nobody knows it.
    Only to those who read my work,
    I am The SILENCED POET!!




    Submitted on 2006-05-02 16:04:18     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      heyy this is cool like icy chill
    yea the silenced poet how cool is that!
    i have nothing else to say
    cool write

    Da Grim Reaperessss
    | Posted on 2006-05-26 00:00:00 | by DaGrimReaperess | [ Reply to This ]
      Spelling errors fill the poem, and you sound a bit like a whiny child who doesn't get his way all the time. This could be so much better if you didn't use things like ALL CAPS and the word Preppies. Give more of an example of stuff and not just sound like you're one of those kids who sits in the courner all day glaring at people if they try to be nice then goes home and writes poems about how much angst they have in life. Sorry if I'm sounding like a total [censored], but I tend to say what's on my mind.
    | Posted on 2006-05-02 00:00:00 | by Akili | [ Reply to This ]
      mayhem, deceit, paper, and sounds are all misspelled, the seventh and eighthlines feel awkward,, from the misspellings awkwardness, and semi-decent form all tell me that this could be good if you polished it up a bit. All of the errors tell me that you didn't even proofread your poem, if you had, I am sure that you would have found all the errors, this could be a really good peice, if you are willing to put the necessary work into it and clean it up to make it so.
    | Posted on 2006-05-02 00:00:00 | by brokenmuse | [ Reply to This ]
      Welcome =] This was a good write, and a great start. As said, there were a few grammatical errors, and spelling, but otherwise, it was great

    -Charlese
    | Posted on 2006-05-02 00:00:00 | by Yclipse | [ Reply to This ]
      Nice idea to give meaning to the name but I felt some points it didn't flow. My favorite part had to be:

    Murder and meham,
    love and deciet.
    In life im not normal,
    but in poems i bleed.

    There are a couple grammatical errors but that can be fixed with a simple spell check but other than that I thought it was a good write... Welcome to Elite... Anthony
    | Posted on 2006-05-02 00:00:00 | by Kersofmia | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    101506

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry