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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: A Cousin for her to Lovedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: lori_tab
    ASL Info:    27/f/alabama
    Elite Ratio:    4.33 - 1752/1517/481
    Words: 161
    Class/Type: Misc/Serious
    Total Views: 953
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 852



    Description:
       It's about why she loves him and why she is like him.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsA Cousin for her to Lovedots
    -------------------------------------------


    He was sad and had told her he was sad and the girl knew his heart and loved him. She knew the burden of his poetic and sensitive soul. She feltthe exhaustion of his heart. How it somehow seemed to perspire inside from all the excercise that human existence came with. How heavy, like lead, it had felt when she first realized that life was uncontrollable. And, by no rule or higher power, nor was it written, that life was fair. She knew this to be fact. Death and love had proven it to her on more that one occasion. Her own her screamed to her, and wondered;knew, that his screams were as tired as hers. The lonliness she felt in her heart was a cousin to the nervousness in his eyes. The mother of her lonliness was her understanding of the truth. And this truth would make him bitterand give offspring and the offspring would be his nervous eyes.




    Submitted on 2006-05-05 09:37:26     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      i like this poem girl smoke a lil weed she git deeep
    | Posted on 2006-05-05 00:00:00 | by urbanguttah | [ Reply to This ]
      wow this is really great its like a story the first line was so emotionfull that i kept reading i was gonna stop cuz i thought it was another newb poets crap about getting beat and dumped but this is great you have a great vocabulary perspire wow.... i dont like pointing out typos cuz it anoys me alot cuz i cant spell but feltthe that i think is two words =p nice metaphore (i think is the word) comparing heavy and lead and stuff....wow

    everything was like totaly perfect ecept this part Her own her screamed to her was a bit confusing is she a slave? or am i just an idiot. =p well this was really good and im adding it to my favriots (6th ever)
    great write

    Trevor...~
    | Posted on 2006-05-05 00:00:00 | by goomaster03 | [ Reply to This ]


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