I really liked it. And I loved it when you changed it to a different point of view. I just want to know if I am getting it right. Is the first stanza now and the rest in the past. If so, its pure brilliance to do that. SO you can get the story behind the first stanza, to know why you felt that way. And if not, its still works for me!! Its good very very good!!!
I liked it and thought i was a good poem. You made a few minor mistakes like spelling. The poem changes from 1st to 2nd person but it sounds okay that way to me. I think it all fits together. It could be the way the girl feels and then someone looking in on her life. Keep up the good work.
That was really good! I like your unique style of writing! At the beginning, you can kindda tell what the "story" is about, but then you kindda teeter off.....! But i'm not saying thats a bad thing, like i said b-4 you have a unique style of writing and you should keep that...it's what makes you stand out! :) Keep up the good work!