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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: You're My Favorite Songdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: lebeauvide
    ASL Info:    24/F
    Elite Ratio:    2.29 - 75/295/165
    Words: 322
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Love
    Total Views: 946
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 2163



    Description:
       I don't know where this came from


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsYou're My Favorite Songdots
    -------------------------------------------


    She sits alone to think
    About all the things she'll never be.
    Wonders aloud:
    "Why won't anyone love me?"
    He hears her question,
    But he can't respond,
    Because whenever he's near her,
    His voice is gone

    (Because boys with guitars get the girls at the bars
    Not a lonely quiet man with a beer in his hand
    He drinks her away each night of the week
    She's his noose, a control freak
    But she's not there anymore,
    She's long gone,
    And she should have known,
    She's his favorite song)

    He sits alone to console himself
    Trying to wash the stains from his mind
    He screams to the four walls that surround him:
    "WHERE ARE THE THINGS I LEFT BEHIND?"
    She hears his cries,
    But she walks away.
    She says to herself,
    "I've got nothing to say."


    (Because the girls with guitars get the boys at the bars
    Not a lonely quiet woman with a beer in her hand
    She drinks him away each night of the week
    He's her noose, a control freak
    But he's not there anymore,
    He's long gone,
    And he should have known,
    He's her favorite song)

    They pass eachother on the street
    They look up and their eyes meet
    They say nothing, but they scream with their eyes,
    For feelings like that are so hard to disguise
    It's written on the walls of the house where they live
    they've given all they had to give
    Oh, but only if looks could kill,
    They say to eachother, "I love you still."

    (When i go to bars all I see are the scars
    The ones a lonely person has, with a beer in their hand
    I drink you away each night of the week
    You're my noose, a control freak
    But you're not here anymore,
    You're long gone,
    And you should have known,
    You're my favorite song
    You're my favorite song)





    Submitted on 2006-05-09 14:34:56     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      'Because boys with guitars get the girls at the bars'

    'And she should have known,
    She's his favorite song'

    My favorite lines
    | Posted on 2006-05-19 00:00:00 | by teenage_dirtbag | [ Reply to This ]
      This is so great... I love it. There was a good flow going on till the last chorus... I like the last chorus, it gives it a good strong ending but it doesn't flow with the rest of the song quite right.
    | Posted on 2006-05-19 00:00:00 | by teenage_dirtbag | [ Reply to This ]
      This is better than amazing. though the rhymes and meter were off a bit, making this into a song would be a snap. I loved the changing chorus, it worked so well. The difering viewpoints told the story of this song very well, without too much or too little detail. By the way, if you find a girl at a bar playing guitar, marry her immeadietly.
    Thanks for making my day better with this awesome peice.
    Wishing for more
    ~Brian
    | Posted on 2006-05-10 00:00:00 | by Imadjinn | [ Reply to This ]
      Yahhh!!! coming from a guitarist, i had music in my head the whole time, like this is really good, I am so glad it's not a cliché piece of crap, cause then you just would of let me down, lol, it reminds of Bright eyes for some reason, or The Good life or something "Lovers need lawyers" which is a great song by the way. Anyways, it feels totally original, and keeps you rite into it the whole time, there is nothing i would of done to this to make it anybetter. keep it up, if you ever get it recorded let me know.

    jetPilot
    | Posted on 2006-05-09 00:00:00 | by JetPilot | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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    10. What would you have done differently?
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    12. Does it feel original?



    102459

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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