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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: what if?dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: unknown soldier
    ASL Info:    17/kenner, La (N.O)
    Elite Ratio:    3.58 - 1348/1346/203
    Words: 240
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Serious
    Total Views: 2116
    Average Vote:    4.6667
    Bytes: 1420



    Description:
       this is just a bunch of questions put in the form of a rap verse.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotswhat if?dots
    -------------------------------------------


    What if we lived in a world with women and no men?
    A land where winners donít win
    Beginnings that donít end
    What if we had had stories with endings that never begin?
    What if we had killers but no sin?
    Juice with no gin
    Itís like lions with no dens
    What if we had a race full of poets with no pens?
    What if we had brothers with no kin?
    And coke without dope men
    How could we have schools with no children?
    Can we have heroes without villains?
    Would we have zeroes without millions?
    Thereís nothing underneath me as I start to descend
    What would happen if I died to be born again?
    Can we have a breeze without a stormy wind?
    What if God returned in the form of Him?
    Can we have life without death?
    What if we had the highest elevations with no depths?
    How can we speak with no breath?
    What if we had a right with no left?
    What if there were oceans but no water?
    We already have daughters without fathers
    What if we had yin with no yang?
    What about culture with no slang?
    Gang bangers that donít bang
    What if we had phones that never rang
    Singers who never sang
    What if we had lips that had never been kissed?
    What if this world was the true definition of bliss?
    What if none of this even fucking exists?




    Submitted on 2006-05-14 01:20:22     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I love this poem!! I'm adding it to my favorites. I love the what if questions. And you did a great job of showing that with out an opposite, or something to go along with it, nothing means anything... did that makes sense? lol
    | Posted on 2006-05-31 00:00:00 | by Kelly17 | [ Reply to This ]
      Stumbled upon your poetry, how else right. This poem is kicking my ass, I like it. I'm big into philosophy and this fits nicely. I'll forgo putting some book plugs in here.
    Anywho.
    Very nice.
    | Posted on 2006-05-24 00:00:00 | by Elite__s | [ Reply to This ]
      Shorty you did it up
    I can't even think of any words to put together to express my feelings about this.
    Damn you got me speechless and that's hard to do.
    Keep your head up don't look down
    cause just like your words on day your head might be wearing a crown
    Holla
    ~Rene'~
    | Posted on 2006-05-21 00:00:00 | by soaring eyes | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow this really makes you think after you read completely....wow I loved it! It ha sto go on my faves!!!!! I agree with "Magnolia Steele" it does remind you of the song by Jadakiss "Why" Great poem its going on my faves if you dont mind....and if you do.....oh well. jk lol. Take care.

    ~Christina
    | Posted on 2006-05-15 00:00:00 | by POETRY | [ Reply to This ]
      Looks like someone got alot on his mind since school is over and done with. I liked your questions. Some of them were really good. It reminded me of Jadakiss's song "Why". I think your flow was good. And you kept the feel of wondering clear to the end. Good work Candyman.

    Catrina
    | Posted on 2006-05-15 00:00:00 | by Magnolia Steele | [ Reply to This ]
      this is cool man, it shows how flawed life and society is....it also shows that you have a hell of alot of questions to ask...that thing about the poets with no pens was cool...I haven't been on in a while. I gotta start reading your [censored] more....
    | Posted on 2006-05-14 00:00:00 | by maninthemirror | [ Reply to This ]
      That was really cool. Odd to think of life without all of the opposites or counterparts, kinda shows the connection of everything in it's own way, ya think?
    | Posted on 2006-05-14 00:00:00 | by Suffer Well | [ Reply to This ]
      your mind is working overtime ha ha, there is a lot to think about aint there? its different from the other stuff you have done, you just dont stop impresing me,

    keep em cummin

    kyrenia
    | Posted on 2006-05-14 00:00:00 | by secret kisses | [ Reply to This ]
      wow your mind must have been in agony with all these questions lol, there are a lot of them here, which has kinda made me think, now you have got my mind boggled,

    keep me posted, nice write
    shae
    | Posted on 2006-05-14 00:00:00 | by shae_indauk | [ Reply to This ]
      wow that was so [censored] awesome Troy! you asked so many questions that ppl wouldn't think to write about and made them come together into one tight as hell, questioning existance write. I loved this so much! You had so many good points, instant fave.
    ~peace
    | Posted on 2006-05-14 00:00:00 | by silent_death12 | [ Reply to This ]
      This took my damn breathe away, [censored], how in the hell! This shows your talent One hundred percent, I can't beleive you thought this up. I truly admire you. ;) guess what, I had no favorite lines the whole thing was my favorite, that's why it's going on my favorites. :) It made so much sense, especialy when you said,
    "What if we had a race full of poets with no pens?" Once again, you really did it!

    I love it, I love it, I love it!

    | Posted on 2006-05-14 00:00:00 | by SavedDragon | [ Reply to This ]
      hey troy!!! im blowin up ur comment box i dont u!! hehe!!i really had 2 sit and think about what u were sayin after i finished readin this!! i was like ya wat if none of this exist but what would happened to the other thing! wow that made no sense!! ok anyway i love it!! SOOOOOOOO MUCH!!
    u made me think! hehe!
    ~akaila~
    i never think damn u broke my record!!
    o ya how was prom?
    | Posted on 2006-05-20 00:00:00 | by iluvpoetry_1 | [ Reply to This ]


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