Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Last Leaf Leavingdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: mugsy
    ASL Info:    68/M/Sooke/ B.C./Can.
    Elite Ratio:    4.1 - 138/106/35
    Words: 46
    Class/Type: Poetry/Nostalgia
    Total Views: 1287
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 308



    Description:
       Musings--


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsLast Leaf Leavingdots
    -------------------------------------------


    As the last brown leaf
    Fails its grasp of the tree,
    Floating down to earth
    Like a bewildered kite
    To land softly.
    A papery crisp,
    To be trodden into the muck
    of the season,
    While I ponder the years
    beneath my yellow
    rubber galoshes.....




    Submitted on 2006-05-14 21:53:37     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Uhhh...what are galoshes??? I like the nature you put into your poems. The changing of seasons being related to the changing of people's lives is amazing. Great write.
    Katana
    | Posted on 2006-08-08 00:00:00 | by Katana Ryoko | [ Reply to This ]
      You make me miss the changing of the seasons. I live in Arizona where its hot and hotter and things go fast and faster. I am from Colorado originally. Your works take me to another time, another way of looking at the world. I especially liked the bewildered kite line.
    | Posted on 2006-05-30 00:00:00 | by feather | [ Reply to This ]
      I like how you equate the years of life to the leaves that have fallen from the trees. Very well written and I enjoyed reading this.

    Frank.
    | Posted on 2006-05-16 00:00:00 | by Frank Maguire | [ Reply to This ]
      How about deleting the comma after YEARS? Also IT'S should be ITS.

    The bewildered kite is a great image, and it ties in well with the "lost years" feeling you get at the end. I know that at age 44 I am a little bewildered at how my life has gotten away from me. Makes me wonder if I have more leaves on the tree or on the ground!

    Annie
    | Posted on 2006-07-12 00:00:00 | by annie0888 | [ Reply to This ]
      galoshes???
    I loved this peice.. the image of the leaf loosing it's grip and being bewildered!!! I can feel the bitof sadness I feel each fall when the lieaves are falling on the ground and the smell of winter is in the air...
    this is going into my favorites
    | Posted on 2006-07-16 00:00:00 | by mimi | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    103244

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Linger written by saartha
    Can't let my demons go written by faideddarkness
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    On Loop written by Daniel Barlow
    Wavelength written by saartha
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    cleverly shunned written by CrypticBard
    In the end written by Janesaddiction
    When Crows Tick on Windows written by metallichick786
    This written by Chelebel
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    I will call out your name written by RisingSon
    ME written by jjd
    A Sonnet for Nina written by SavedDragon
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    Treasure Chest written by PieceOfCake
    Commencement written by Ramneet
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    The Promise written by annie0888

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry