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Window to the Future, Death

Author: Linkins_knot
ASL Info:    14/Male/Behind a Computer
Elite Ratio:    2.12 - 20 /46 /19
Words: 121
Class/Type: Poetry /Misc
Total Views: 916
Average Vote:    4.0000
Bytes: 741


i saw a picture of my friend looking out at a window and i was playing the song 'purity' by slipknot, the song is about a girl in a box. so i came up with this...

Window to the Future, Death

Stare out my window
To look at my broken past
Thinking of the things I owe
Who was there to last…

I look through the window
To see who’s there
Watch the time grow old
While sitting in despair

I ponder behind the window
Study the room inside
Time seems to grow old
My hearts beginning to die

I swing at the window
To see if it will bust
If it does, I will then go
And let my heart not turn to rust

I look at the hole in the window
I’m almost free
My soul feels no longer sold
I’m back in the world, oh no, how could this be?!

(To Be Continued…)

Submitted on 2006-05-15 15:30:41     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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  This is really good
I like the way you captured the readers attention with every word
I also liked how you left them guessing until you posted the continuation
That my Friend is a clever Idea
Great Job
God Bless

Please if you get a chance Please take a look at some of my writes and let me know what you think
Thank You
| Posted on 2006-05-16 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
  to be continued........ i hate those words in the end of a great poem. i hope you do more like this.

| Posted on 2006-05-16 00:00:00 | by manymoodsofme | [ Reply to This ]
That's awesome.
Hmm, but I think you should change "While sitting in despair" to something like "While I sit in despair" or something :D.
Over all it was good!
Hope to hear more from you.

| Posted on 2006-05-15 00:00:00 | by fallenpopcorn10 | [ Reply to This ]

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