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    dots Submission Name: Trapped Insidedots

    Author: foxy lee
    ASL Info:    20 f/CT/SA
    Elite Ratio:    2.96 - 27/23/10
    Words: 105
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 580
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 729


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    dotsTrapped Insidedots

    Beleaguered thoughts of tranquility
    Trapped inside by insufferable walls of negativity
    Restraining goals with heavy might
    Retaining a sea of happiness
    behind strong iron gates

    The happy sea and tranquil thoughts long to flow
    They long to be touched by the light of day
    But their goals cannot be reached
    For they are trapped inside - unwillingly

    Do not let them be trapped
    Rearrange and change the flow
    Break down the iron gates
    that negativity has built

    Reach out from the depths of obscurity
    Seize the light of day and be warmed!
    For if not...
    The happiness inside
    will be lost forever

    Submitted on 2006-05-16 03:46:49     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      okay, ths poem was confusing to me. i liked the way it rhymed and stuff, but i didn't know really what it was about. call me blonde, but i didn't know. um, yeah, you write good poetry!
    | Posted on 2007-03-07 00:00:00 | by bubble_popper15 | [ Reply to This ]
      very deep, philosophical stuff! you did a good job of painting a picture that not only shows the tension but makes the reader feel those thoughts trying desperately to escape....awesome!
    | Posted on 2006-05-16 00:00:00 | by scissorhands | [ Reply to This ]
      the inner self can seem so unknown sometimes if we dont vent accordingly. I dont think that there is a set certain amount of venting someone should do, but when it comes to releasing negative thoughts, i think that healthiest way to cope with them is too VENT through creativee outlets such as ELITE SKILLS.
    i enjoyed the rhymes in your poem. Great insight. Most of all though, you worded this very well.
    Keep em coming..

    SIncerely SinCeer
    | Posted on 2006-05-17 00:00:00 | by SinCeer05 | [ Reply to This ]

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