To my beloved Josie…
'I love you so much that when I write this the tears from my lonely eyes fall onto the paper like stars falling from the desolate sky.
I need you too know none of this is your fault…I just can’t take not having your love anymore.
Oh my god I wish you could see my pain in a physical form…now I suppose you will realise the pain that seeps from my septic heart…I need your love so much…but as I can’t have it anymore…I have decided to take my last steps in this world to deliver this to your door…please don’t cry…I am going to a better place and I will be safe in the arms of our lord…
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH…but there’s nothing you can do now…my life is over.
-Jeremy.'
I wrote this to leave, weave, breath my condensed pain on the page…
My bodily form may be descended, relentless to light I befriended…
But my life’s not ended, I’m still alive in mind, so when the night rains…
The cold, desolate, desperate, eyes cry so delicate to view of pictures…
Of my face, I tried to displace, every trace, of pain from my grace.
By the time you’ve read this, I’ll already be in Gods hands, free from spirit…
I pivot, into a perverted state of mind, suicide lies, lays beside, me as I rise…
The scent of lavender hair, a locket gold, enrolled in my pocket and my soul…
I take memories, stay by your side when your loneliness creeps in your dreams…
Wash away the feeling of silent, violent, naked screams, so my love it feigns…
To remain in your arms, your tender hands caressing, my waist in your palm…
As the thought slips away into the shadows of the night, I attempt to fight…
The urge to grab the knife, and end it tonight, so in between I write, this letter…
So when times get harder, you’ll know things will get better, that sweater…
That you hand weaved, for me, resides in my hand, to dry my eyes from weeping…
But soon god will be backing me back to eternal sleeping, no peaking…
Into the future, but I remiss on my past, blast, cast my mind into over drive.
Times pass…
I attempt to cast…
As I slowly begin laugh…
Bump in my road my path…
But I love you, but will your love last?
Pulsating, racing, pacing, heart trembles, I realise the destiny I’m perilously facing…
Please remember me when I’m gone, as my memory lingers on, free from beat…
I’m free to release this letter, good bye song, the misery’s gone, but don’t cry…
It wasn’t your fault, I understand you had to tell me goodbye, it must have been hell…
Living with a man the cheats, steals, and lies, but couldn’t you see love the lays…
Deep, hidden, ridden, with in my eyes, I was shocked, despised, surprised….
That I had, and let love slip, I slip into a kamikaze state as I watch the blood drip…
Upon my dressing table, I undress my latest tale a fable, living with me, inside…
So I apologise, but I have to leave you behind, my vision becomes blind…
Blurry, undefined, a sedative smile as desperate pain disintegrates for a while.
When you finish reading, send your best hopes for me…
I love you, my dear beloved Josie. |
Submission Name: To my beloved Josie
