Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Secret Admirerdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: kession
    ASL Info:    18~M~ok
    Elite Ratio:    3.16 - 115/156/63
    Words: 146
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 1350
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 961



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSecret Admirerdots
    -------------------------------------------


    You were the apple of my eye,
    the prettiest girl in school,
    I wanted you to be mine,
    but I was'nt considered to be "cool".

    I watched you everyday,
    in the halls and in class,
    compared to the other guys,
    I came in last.

    I knew you four years,
    but never said a word,
    I was always afraid,
    I would get hurt.

    I wish I had'nt been so shy,
    and told you how I felt,
    at least then I'd know,
    how it could've turned out.

    I had so many chances,
    to tell you everything,
    but I wasted them all,
    everytime I said nothing.

    Now you're gone,
    so far away,
    but if you could hear me,
    this is what I would say.

    I loved you more than anyone,
    I miss you everyday,
    and I'd give anything,
    to have you here again.




    Submitted on 2006-05-18 01:30:52     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      that was good. i liked the use of the quotation marks and periods and the other grammer. but also there was some repetition as in a lot of "i" just try not to use a lot of it bc sometimes it tends to bore ppl.
    | Posted on 2006-07-30 00:00:00 | by butterflygirl27 | [ Reply to This ]
      well I guess there's a kewl pattern in ur writes, that's kewl tho, I'm just kinda jealous, I'm not very good at writing about love, but you are so that's ok lol. awww that was sad though, yeah I am pretty sure we've all kept our mouths shut when we later would have wanted to at least tell a part of what we were feeling, personally I'd rather end up getting hurt in a relationship (and I've been hurt enough both ways to say this) then never knowing if there might have been a relationship or not, there's something so much more painful in a "what if" ya know? and then you can't just go back and replay that chance you had to let that person know what was really on your mind, and before long they're with somebody else and yeah, it's just a mess, I'm rambling lol very good write, I haven't read that much but I really like ur stuff,
    much love,
    ~jess
    | Posted on 2006-06-25 00:00:00 | by silent_death12 | [ Reply to This ]
      Aww. I think we have all been through this. Hopefully a life lesson has been learned? Tell people how you feel, always. Nothing ventured is nothing gained and the worst that can happen is they do not return the feelings....yeah maybe they will laugh at you, maybe they will whisper about you. At least however, you will not forever be tormented by those two words "what if." Go out and have fun, you will meet someone who will make this a sweet memory in your later adulthood. Remember "Unanswered Prayers" by Garth Brooks.
    | Posted on 2006-05-18 00:00:00 | by Suffer Well | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    103745

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry