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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: St. Paradoxdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: wewak11
    Elite Ratio:    3.8 - 3436/3630/329
    Words: 96
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 1317
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 791



    Description:
       why, why, why?


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSt. Paradoxdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Falling upwards, seeing faith so blindly,
    Crucifixes starring at your summit;
    Screaming bloody hatred, smiling kindly,
    Causing mankind's rising hopes to plummet.

    Stealing from the Godless as they're praying,
    Calm with rage you cry a happy war song;
    Vengeful mercy's thoughts are darkly graying,
    All will strip these earthly clothes before long.

    Fly your crashing flag and die immortal,
    Yesterday's tomorrow passes slowly;
    Shout your secrets, close the open portal,
    Heaven's hell is only for the holy.

    Somewhere in the Neverland of winning
    Screams will choke on breaths of righteous sinning.




    Submitted on 2006-05-18 21:07:43     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I get the feeling you are speaking about religion and politics and not in a kind way. lol. I was not fully clear on your message, but I was certain of the anger in the wording. Good flow and imagery. Good work!

    Catrina
    | Posted on 2006-05-22 00:00:00 | by Magnolia Steele | [ Reply to This ]
      ooooooohhhhhh....don't get me started...lol

    congratulations for the stones to post an inflammatory religious/political piece, by the way...

    I'm hoping I will have a creation or two come to mind in the next day or two...lying low and licking my wounds at the moment...it's hard sometimes to be loved too much...does that make sense?

    Anyway...nice work, as usual

    Take care

    ~B~
    | Posted on 2006-05-22 00:00:00 | by Emerging Soul | [ Reply to This ]
      I agree with everything that's been said about this piece. Sorry I don't have any new insight to add. But I thought I'd let you know I'm adding to my faves. EXCELLENT write. ^_^

    ~~Stephanie~~
    | Posted on 2006-05-19 00:00:00 | by literary lover | [ Reply to This ]
      I like poems written this way. Such an irony - religion, and what a good job you've made of getting the point accross. Though it's confusing for a second, each line - it's a good thing as it almost makes the reader reach their 'conclusion', which is so much better than telling someone something

    You have done a perfect job of getting every single line to rhyme, well perfectly ( as usual... yawn ) - I'm not jealous, not a bit.... no really, I'm not.....

    :)

    Take care
    Debbie
    | Posted on 2006-05-19 00:00:00 | by cerberus74 | [ Reply to This ]
      Great! I liked how you showed how lost the ones who fight their precious "religious wars" are. And how their goals are lost as well - like in this line:

    "Heaven's hell is only for the holy"

    -they strive for heaven calling themselves holy but create hell in its place

    And throughout the poem you managed to think of other "paradoxes" like this one - I quoted the word because in their lack of sense, they carry a sense even greater.

    The last last line is kind of terrifying, makes me think of all the victims of this religious (and all other) war raging - it as though makes me feel the demonic breath you described...brrr

    Good write, once again.

    Be well
    | Posted on 2006-05-19 00:00:00 | by shoggoth | [ Reply to This ]
      this poem gives me a headache, but in a good way. it's very creative, and it's pretty awsome that you could think of all those paradoxes. and strangly enough i agreed with every one of them. great great write.

    peace.
    meredith.
    | Posted on 2006-05-19 00:00:00 | by art_is_hard | [ Reply to This ]
      well, how very intersting that i should read this work of yours today considering that i am about 20 mins. into writing "whirlwind paradox"a poem about trying desperately to find trust again within a relationship.

    i just love the way you really bring to light a paradox. "falling upwards" and "seeing faith so blindly" it was truly powerful. that pic. of osama bin laden is absolutely ########. its raw and vicious. it shocked me whaen i saw it. however, it puts a face on this fantastic poem.

    once again your imagry is excellent and moving. i prefer your poems on love and magic, but, this shall broaden my love and knowledge of the art we call poetry.

    great job again my freind
    ~john-paul
    | Posted on 2006-06-09 00:00:00 | by rev.jpfadeproof | [ Reply to This ]


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