Description: Another piece for Jasmine.
it was inspired by and includes extracts from our msn conversations.
It probably doesn't make much sesne to anyone but the two of us, but it means a great deal to me!
I agree with charmedindentity, I mean that this does have a lot of potential...
Innocence has spoken And now I see the world anew Through eyes of unborn prejudice
Yes, that was a very good beginning, however, I wish to point out a part that didn't sit as well as I wished it would've...: Innocence has spoken. We hear innocence speaking, but where is hate, why do we not hear from hate?
Overall good piece, not many would've gone after this overrated idea and achieve it; making it into a fresher light.
Hey, This piece has a lot of potential. You have so many great ideas in this piece that it is clear you know what you are talking about. I enjoyed the ideas you have portrayed and i think innocence is the most amazing characteristic that i wish i couldn't have lost but then with everything that we are exposed to today, the only way we can remain innocent is to isolate ourselves from the world and drive ourselves nuts. But then our lives will have no purpose and it would be best to die then...
Innocence can be seen in so many different eyes that everytime the word is mentioned, a new view is portrayed.
I think what this piece needs is a reconstruction however because i don't feel you have used the right way to get to people and let them understand what really it is you want them to feel and to see but most importantly to understand. I think you should have a plot as to what are the main features of this piece and how you want to lay them out. The structure is important. What you plan to do will determine how well the piece will be understood and heartfelt.
It's a beautiful piece....Let other people feel how you feel about this. Let them see the importance of what you wrote.
Pretty much everything i can think about. I like this piece. Innocence means a great deal to me too. Anyhow, hope to see more from you soon. Do take care.... Irina