Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: A Moment in Timedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Anticlownperson
    ASL Info:    16/f/nowhere land
    Elite Ratio:    3.29 - 248/390/118
    Words: 56
    Class/Type: Poetry/Happy
    Total Views: 1135
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 345



    Description:
       I may not have done all the things I want to do yet, but I'm happy with the way things are.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsA Moment in Timedots
    -------------------------------------------


    I have not done great deeds
    I have not travelled the world
    I have not found true love
    But I have seen sunset and sunrise
    I have seen moon-glow and star-shine
    I have walked the rivers
    And roamed the forests
    I have known trues friends and bad
    And if I died tomorrow
    I would be content




    Submitted on 2006-05-23 14:25:37     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      This poem made me relize that there is more to life... that the little things can make you happy... and thats all that realli counts...and its nice to know someone appreciate what they have ... good job :)
    --Elle Ess
    | Posted on 2006-06-03 00:00:00 | by Elle_Ess | [ Reply to This ]
      I quite like what you say here, it's nice. I reckon the piece would benefit from a grammar change or two, to take out the "I have not" repetition, and I'd make it into stanzas, too, it makes more impact of the statement.


    I have done no great deeds
    I have not travelled the world
    Nor have I found true love
    But I have seen sunset and sunrise

    I have seen moon-glow and star-shine
    I have walked the rivers
    And roamed the forests
    I have known trues friends and bad

    And if I died tomorrow
    I would be content

    just my thoughts, like I said, a really nice statement, contentment is very rare, you know!

    well done

    be happy

    Graeme
    | Posted on 2006-05-24 00:00:00 | by wewak11 | [ Reply to This ]
      Never have I read about someone so content, but it brings a smile to my lips to read this short but wonderful poem. I love the sense of honesty and serenity that this poem brings to mind, it's not like other poems and that's what makes it so special. I gotta admit it took my breath away, it's only my fav's list for sure. I'd give this poem a 9.5 out of 10, spread your words like fire...

    Sincerely yours with a bloody kiss,
    Naymless.
    | Posted on 2006-05-23 00:00:00 | by Naymless | [ Reply to This ]
      This is extremely well written in the few short lines you used
    I feel the same way
    Who on This Earth do we have to impress
    It is not part of life to impress anyone
    Life is meant to live it as wholesome and as Loving as we can
    To Prepare us for the next Journey into Heaven
    Great Job!!!
    God Bless
    Ron
    | Posted on 2006-05-23 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      Very well written poem. I liked your word choices and there was a small bit of rhyme. I enjoyed reading this very much. Keep up the writing.
    | Posted on 2006-05-23 00:00:00 | by usglen | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    104482

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry