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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: The Pitdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Silenced poet
    ASL Info:    21/male/oregon
    Elite Ratio:    2.54 - 52/41/21
    Words: 102
    Class/Type: Poetry/I am dead inside
    Total Views: 1118
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 702



    Description:
       Don't even ask man, i was so fried, you have no idea!!!!!


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe Pitdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Insanity mocks me'
    as judgement passes by.
    The portal to my life,
    is just another lie.
    With paper and a pen,
    all mens lifes are molded.
    While mine may turn to sewage waste,
    other lives turn golden.
    Pitty me oh deitys,
    please smite me if you can.
    I'm simply waqlking into darkness,
    will no-one take my hand?
    can i go back, relive my past,
    move backward never forward?
    or just stay here, not forward or back,
    i'll move if ever ordered.

    A slight breeze could sway me,
    just go with the flow.
    don't reach for me now,
    don't reach for me...no!




    Submitted on 2006-05-25 11:34:29     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      This was a pretty well written poem. The last three lines of the first stanza didn't really make much sense to me though. Other than that it was pretty awesome. Keep up the awesome work and I'll keep reading.

    >:D skullreaperX_X
    | Posted on 2006-05-25 00:00:00 | by skullreaperX_X | [ Reply to This ]
      While mine may turn to sewage waste
    Really didnt like this line, but the rest was uber-cool.
    | Posted on 2006-05-25 00:00:00 | by Sushy | [ Reply to This ]
      i love the haze of this peice ../. it "moods" with so many pitfalls ..../. my fav' part is :

    While mine may turn to sewage waste,
    other lives turn golden.


    keep up the good work ,......

    bloodstone
    | Posted on 2006-05-25 00:00:00 | by Bloodstone | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

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    104722

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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    January 10 07
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