Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: this is the last time i will post something like..dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: iluvpoetry_1
    Elite Ratio:    2.87 - 806/439/119
    Words: 101
    Class/Type: Poetry/Depressed
    Total Views: 1243
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 592



    Description:
       some english assignment on sonnets i got an 85%!! w/e!! i dont really like it i just combined some poems! last thing depressing EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsthis is the last time i will post something like..dots
    -------------------------------------------


    I am shouting and I am crying this is not the happy ending I expected.

    All I wanted was to be happy or so I thought
    I never knew I could be rejected!

    I'm drowning in my ouwn tears everyday
    I am falling apart, slowly, dying

    My pillow is still soaked in bitter tears
    I;m falling, only God knows I'm trying.

    I just want to be free from this pain
    But everything I do, has left me in vane.

    ~akaila~
    THIS IS DA LAST THING DEPRESSING I WILL EVER POST ON ELITE EVER EVER AGAIN!!!




    Submitted on 2006-05-27 12:37:29     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Congrats on getting 85%. When I read this I form questions in my head, such as, 'Why are they sad in the first place? What could cause such pain?'
    And really the poem is good in that way, it makes one think about it and ponder.

    Oh, and I hope that your new line of thinking towards poetry goes well.

    Thank you,
    Elissar
    | Posted on 2006-05-27 00:00:00 | by Elissar | [ Reply to This ]
      silly girl...u shoulda had one more stanza to make it an even number. it woulda made it flow better. that is a stupid promise to make. u will be sad again. that is a fact. ur only 14 years old. life will undoubtedly get harder and u will be depressed and probably write more depressing [censored]. use that sorrow to fuel ur poetic flare. ur depressing writes aren't bad because of what u say, u just need to practice more creativity. u have to switch it up a bit. silly girl...do i have to explain everything to u. u might as well be my damn daughter
    | Posted on 2006-07-15 00:00:00 | by unknown soldier | [ Reply to This ]
      OMG I love tis poem! I think we tend to write better poems about sad things then happy things because we all can relate more to sad things! Being that we are writing sad things in a sad poem website NEways I like it another Fav.
    | Posted on 2006-07-17 00:00:00 | by Cordell | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    104961

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry