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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: What a Woman Can Bringdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: vitoko
    ASL Info:    24/M
    Elite Ratio:    4.4 - 690/442/104
    Words: 89
    Class/Type: Prose/Love
    Total Views: 1139
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 543



    Description:
       well yeah i was thinking about a special girl in my life these days... well i hope she likes it and you too


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWhat a Woman Can Bringdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Gaze at the beauty of the rose,
    Not being able to touch it because
    Its thorns just make you suffer and bleed.

    Look at the dove flying,
    Which sees our hate from the sky,
    And gives us peace.

    See how brilliant a diamond is,
    And enjoy its perfection,
    But how imperfect we are.

    Now see your woman,
    How her beauty shines over the world.
    And her love makes you feel that she is the goddes
    That created all this wonderful place just for you.




    Submitted on 2006-05-30 17:05:10     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Hi Vic
    Its been awhile since Ive heard from you
    How are you doing
    I hope everything is going well for you
    This is a beautiful write where you show your Love for your soulmate well
    I really like how you invoked nature into this write to show a little more Love
    Great Job
    God Bless
    Ron

    I have written a lot of new writes if you get a chance Please take a look and let me know what you think
    Please keep in touch
    Your Friend
    Ron
    | Posted on 2006-08-10 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      I think your on to something good.
    I like the poem, kinda makes you
    sit back and think.
    makes you wanna look at things in a diffrent way. Tell I read you again.
    The Poor Man's Poet...
    I'm Out.
    | Posted on 2006-05-30 00:00:00 | by Bobby K | [ Reply to This ]
      very original.
    | Posted on 2006-05-30 00:00:00 | by bmc | [ Reply to This ]
      hey bubz, this was a sweet dedication, she probs will like it, i know i did,
    keep em cummin
    kyrenia
    | Posted on 2006-05-30 00:00:00 | by secret kisses | [ Reply to This ]
      Victor, how have you been? It sure has been a long time my friend. This was very good. You have improved so much that I was able to undertstand every line and just be dranw in with your words. Your use of imagery as always, was very good. Your flow, also good. I saw no typos and was happy to read such a beautiful and romantic. Good job!

    Catrina
    | Posted on 2006-09-10 00:00:00 | by Magnolia Steele | [ Reply to This ]
      I like it. I like the way you are thinking about this topic. Interesting way to put it also.. I liked:

    "Gaze at the beauty of the rose,
    Not being able to touch it because
    Its thorns just make you suffer and bleed."

    Makes me think of temptation. Would love to but there will be consiquences. Awsome job! Will have to read more.
    Holy xx
    | Posted on 2006-09-11 00:00:00 | by Holy Wood | [ Reply to This ]


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