This won’t be pretty
This won’t be perfect.
To be quite honest I’m not sure what this will be at all. If you’re looking for pretty or perfect. If you’re looking for the most entertaining story. Something to lift your spirits or make you feel whatever you want to feel. Don’t read this. This isn’t a story, so if you want to read a story then don’t read this. This won’t always flow so flawlessly. This isn’t something that takes skill. If you’re looking for talent, believe me, you won’t find it here. My sentences won’t always be complete. My punctuation won’t be right on. This may not always make sense. Maybe sometimes I’ll use big pretty words, complex sentence structures, or clever metaphors to confuse you. If you’re afraid of confusion, I don’t want you reading this, but you still can. Maybe sometimes I’ll use big pretty words, complex sentence structures, or clever metaphors to illustrate a point. If that’s what you want, if that’s all you want to read, if that’s what you’re looking for then stop looking at this. Click that button a few inches above where you’re looking right now. The one that say’s back, click that. Find something else to sacrifice your time on. This won’t be worth it. If you’re getting real pissed off right now because you’re assuming I’m assuming to know what you’re thinking then stop reading this. Go find yourself a large fruit or vegetable to fuck yourself with instead. May I suggest a pineapple? If crude words or those scary indefinable thoughts scare you, as honestly as I can say this, this won’t be for you.
If you just read the last paragraph, and noticed how repetitive it is, and you feel the need to point this out, don’t do it.
This isn’t supposed to be pretty.
This isn’t supposed to be perfect.
This isn’t supposed to be anything.
This formation of words isn’t suppose to come to one point. I think it’s safe to assume that this will all indeed be rather fucking pointless and that’s the point. This isn’t your distraction, this is mine. This is my safe place, this is my addiction, this is rehab.
This is whatever the fuck I call it.
Whatever you’re seeing in this, whatever point you think it could have, you wrote that, NOT ME. If you won’t judge a book by it’s cover then don’t judge it by your own. There will be nothing accomplished with this intentionally, including your entertainment. I know you must think very highly of yourself, but I don’t, so deal with it. If you can’t deal with that, don’t read this book.
At times this will be vague and seemingly a string of sentences trying to describe something undefined. If you’re closed minded enough, I might seem like I’m crazy. If you’re closed minded enough, that might really matter. If that really matters, don’t read this.
If you don’t have a sense of humor, or compassion.
If you think you have a perfect sense of right or wrong.
If this is a distraction from something else.
You may not want to read this. I really don’t know, it might work the other way around but I can’t make any promises. I can’t promise it’ll be worth the 3-30 minutes it’ll take to read this. I myself doubt that this will work at all. If you think because I’m concerned this won’t work that that means that it definitely won’t work, then it definitely won’t work. If none of this is making sense, it might still work, but I doubt it.
If you’re expecting Pretty Perfect Polished Honest Deceitful Misleading Wise Clever Smart Structured Organized Chaotic Flawed Entertaining Sensible Happy Angry Sad Loving Hurtful Words
Then don’t read this, it can’t work. If you think this has to work some way that you can express to work at all, then it won’t work. If it still does, that won’t work for me, so lie. If you’re going to tell me you don’t lie, don’t waste your time, I don’t believe you.
If you’re looking to learn a lesson, go to school. Get yourself a degree and become a professional person. Take a course in your interests 101. Make sure the fields open and the wages are high. You’re going to have a lot of money to pay back.
If cynical people make you angry.
If black people make you angry.
If White Yellow Green Christian faithful faithless Heretic Gay Straight Bisexual A-sexual Transsexual Pre-op transsexual Post-op transsexual Happy Angry Country City Skinny Fat Assertive Lazy Strong Weak Liberal Conservative Pro-life Pro-choice Professional Homeless Proud Racist Sexist Horny Boring Exciting Respectable People make you hate don’t read this.
If people make you hate, don’t read this.
If theirs not a person you hate, don’t read this.
If your patience isn’t long enough to read more, then I don’t even need to tell you but don’t read this. If the fact that I kind of like the thought of pissing a few people off pisses you off, good. Just let me know, and this still might work.
This isn’t a pretty story, or a perfect poem, or an orchestrated series of events. This won’t make you smile because I think that’s what you want to buy. This won’t be dirty because I think that’s worth an extra 50 cents to you. This won’t be clean because I’m concerned about your feelings. Believe me, I’m not. Considering you could be almost anyone, I really don’t think that’s such a big deal. So give me a fucking break.
Sometimes I might make a complete contradiction of myself. On occasion I might say something completely random and utterly revolting, just because in my sick sad little delusional mind I take pleasure imagining you squirm at my thoughts. Call it an issue, call it a sickness, just don’t call it a problem.
I’m sick of this worlds definition. The way we pick out the easiest clearest words. I’m sick of searching for a perfect understanding of your easy definition. I haven’t given up on the world, or life or love, I’ve just decided it’s time to give up trying to make it make sense the way you claim it has to.
If you’re not sure what this is or will be, and for some reason this is still fascinating then read this.
I would like to welcome you to my thoughts….
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