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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: forever?dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: maninthemirror
    ASL Info:    17/m/arkansas
    Elite Ratio:    2.64 - 224/318/109
    Words: 128
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Misc
    Total Views: 694
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 804



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsforever?dots
    -------------------------------------------


    I love you for what you've done to me/
    I hate you for being done with me/
    I love you for misdirecting me/
    I hate you for when you tested me/
    I love you for your experiments/
    I can't hate you cause you don't give no shits/
    I love you for hating bridgett with me/
    I hate her and hope she dies slowly/
    but I love you girl thats the bottomline/
    I understand you need some time/
    but what about me/
    girl can't you see/
    I'm tour up about this, I"m dying, please/
    put a stop to this, I'm in need/
    it's like a sudden stab to the chest/
    youve always told me I'm the best/
    and suddenly we arent together/
    what ever happened to forever/





    Submitted on 2006-06-10 14:41:26     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      this is so sad!! but i really like it! this one is allowed to have a repetitive line its good! most cant have one but this one sounds good with it! love it!

    amber</3zakabi
    | Posted on 2006-12-18 00:00:00 | by Suicidalchild51 | [ Reply to This ]
      hey bubz, i think everyone goes through this at one point in our lives,, it were kool, your obviously hurt about splitting up with person, its v. personal,
    keep em cummin
    kyrenia
    | Posted on 2006-06-11 00:00:00 | by secret kisses | [ Reply to This ]
      another great, personal, but great ryme, not as good as the last one, this didn't put no insperation in me like ur other ones do, but it still good though
    | Posted on 2006-06-10 00:00:00 | by Robbing Hood | [ Reply to This ]
      God this was great but it made me sad and it made me mad at the same time. I really liked it but it made me feel like cryin. God it really tore u up bout brittany I feel bad for u. N-E-ways since I am talking to u on the phone I will talk to ya later.

    Angel
    | Posted on 2006-06-27 00:00:00 | by ForsakenAngel | [ Reply to This ]
      I agree wit troy started off good ended good but in between you were kinda rocky. I understand alittle but not completey what you're going through every day will get a little better.

    DePoetry
    | Posted on 2006-06-19 00:00:00 | by Poeticprincess | [ Reply to This ]
      and suddenly we arent together/
    what ever happened to forever/

    those were the best lines in this one. u started off good and u ended greatly. the first four lines were really good too. but i didn't really like everything in between too much. i personally think u should have left bridgett out of this completely. it should have been just about u and ur girl. just my opinion
    | Posted on 2006-06-11 00:00:00 | by unknown soldier | [ Reply to This ]
      awww i like that. sounds like you still want to be with that person even if things got messed up or someone got done wrong in the relationship. i know how that feels. i know exactly what this is saying. it just sucks going through it.


    - Kimmy
    | Posted on 2006-07-21 00:00:00 | by Kimmy | [ Reply to This ]
      You know, it feels like the last line unbent a paperclip and shoved in into my heart.
    That's great

    I love the way everything you write is filled with emotion.

    "I love you for hating bridgett with me/
    I hate her and hope she dies slowly/"

    lol That made me laugh. I can't even begin to wonder why you hate Bridgett so much, but I love all the mean things you say about her.
    ( What can I say? The anger makes me happy.)

    Ooo And thank you for the comment.
    Yeah... I hate those [censored] grammar-obsessed [censored]s.


    -nikkki
    | Posted on 2006-07-11 00:00:00 | by Liv2LoveThePain | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



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