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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: The Stormdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: jennah
    ASL Info:    19/F/IL
    Elite Ratio:    4.07 - 101/73/22
    Words: 138
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 808
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 873



    Description:
       This was a real experience for me, the storm anyway. My overactive imagination could account for the rest.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe Stormdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I sat and watched the storm roll in
    across the choppy lake,
    as the wind cried fiercely
    leaving white caps in its wake.

    The air was filled with energy
    something strange arrived
    the wind began to ease
    from dirges down to sighs.

    One by one the others left
    casting glances at the sky
    afraid to dance among the drops
    and see the angels cry.

    As the sheets of water fell
    and quickly soaked my head
    I knew that if I chose,
    I could still be safe in bed.

    I could hide under the covers
    and cower there in fright
    and never feel the mercy
    that washes over me tonight.

    I sat alone with upturned face
    as tears fell in disguise
    and let the water cleanse my soul
    each time an angel cries.




    Submitted on 2006-06-11 09:12:36     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I really like this poem. I agree with Rocky there are a variety of interpretations for this poem which means that almost anyone who reads it can in some way relate. I disagree with Rocky on the angels though i really think the help the poem even more...it's an awesome poem Keep Writin
    | Posted on 2006-06-11 00:00:00 | by kapri49 | [ Reply to This ]
      Interesting read. Like the others said, it is open to interpretation. However, that is not a bad thing. For me, it brought up images of relaxation as I enjoy the chaos of storms. For you...I'm not entirely sure. The angel thing threw me off. Are storms something spiritually personal to you?

    In honest reply, Colten
    | Posted on 2006-06-13 00:00:00 | by Colten | [ Reply to This ]
      I liked it. I could feel the storm, and all that came with it, with you. That's hard to do, and it just draws the reader into the piece more. I'd have to agree that the parts on the angels don't really fit, though they do add some class to the poem. The room for interpetation is really good, and that makes it all better. I would tell you what was wrong with it...but I can't really find any. ^_^

    Cheers,
    ~Sephe~
    | Posted on 2006-06-11 00:00:00 | by Persephone | [ Reply to This ]
      i tried to like this poem, but it's just not likeable. It's not very creative at all... I sometimes have poems like this that i've written, but I wouldn't post them for the world to see... There's nothing original or inspiring here...

    ... not that you are a bad poet, but it's like you barely tried on this one. ... and i have no sympathy about giving you a nasty comment. If it was obvious you'd atleast spent some time and thought on it i would be able to be more constructive.
    | Posted on 2006-06-11 00:00:00 | by mrmundane | [ Reply to This ]
      It seems to me like a very good poem, I like the setting, the lake, the rain... I darenot say what you're talking about (which does not makes it a bad piece) I'm just saying it allows a good variety of interpretations (which makes it a good poem). The only trouble is the two lines about the angels, I think they mess up the whole thing.
    | Posted on 2006-06-11 00:00:00 | by Rocky Raccoon | [ Reply to This ]


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