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    dots Submission Name: Rant on emo.dots

    Author: Orin
    Elite Ratio:    4.27 - 93/97/43
    Words: 376
    Class/Type: Rant/Venting
    Total Views: 1184
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 2178

       After a terrible emo show.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsRant on emo.dots

    I hate stupid emo people. Their music sucks. Their hairstyles look like some horrible anime geek convention rejects shit mousse, gel and other hair-styling products on their skulls. No, you dumbshits. Those highlights are not interesting and original. You all look like fucking Rogue. Shaving half your head and combing the other half over is not neat. You look like some sideways middle-aged-male-pattern-baldness-suffering fuck. I could even deal with the hair. But the tight-ass jeans you stole from your ex girlfriends? What the fuck? Seriously. If you fit in a size 0, and you have a penis, chances are it's time for you to eat some fucking Burger King or something because to be honest, you look like a bitch. Sandals? Sure. Sandals pwn. But if you paint your fucking toenails in a rainbow-y pattern, either don't show it off, or just wear a shirt that says "I love to blow the meat-whistle." And what about those tight shirts? Ok...lime green is a great color for a tight shirt. If there are some boobs behind it. Otherwise, as Vince Voss would say "Gee Ay Wy."

    So...you look like a jeans-pattern-spandex wrapped mop sticking out of a retina-burning-colored shirt. Sure. But the fucking music! Oh my God. Somebody hand me a fucking cottonball and a bandaid, because I swear this bleeding from my ears won't stop. If your drummer is good enough to sub for the guy from Slipknot when he calls in sick after a bad party, why would you waste him on a bunch of stupid fucks who couldn't figure out which end of the guitar they stick up their ass, and a vocalist that can't decide whether to sound like he's channeling Satan or a 6-year old girl on Helium?

    I swear to all things holy, that if I see another silly little bitch with a cleverly-arranged pattern of facial hair and a beanie hat that has more colors on it than a pile of vomit after somebody ate fourteen pounds of different kinds of Skittles, I am going to stab them in the eye with a plastic spork.

    The solution? Find out what DnB is, get a strobelight, take some E and learn how to live life properly.

    Submitted on 2006-06-13 09:21:04     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      This was very forthright and honest. Yes, some groups of people are easy to pick on, but they must know it too. Everything comes at a cost - including style choice.

    I know this because I used to dress for shock value. I went through several phases before I figured out one that really felt like "me," and with age it has only been refined... a lot.

    I suppose you could say I went through an "emo" phase, but that was before there was "emo," and I just did what I felt like... took flack for it too, as nobody else was brave enough to try it first.

    People that don't want any sort of attention are the ones who wear jeans and a t-shirt; they blend into the crowd. But anyone with spiked rainbow hair and pierced cheekbones/lips/eyebrows/ears stretched to kingdom come with those cork thingies, and black lips and nails has to know they're going to be the focus of some attention. I feel certain this is what they want, or at least feel some of the negative attention is worthwhile for the benefits.

    What are the benefits? Self-expression, art, fun, and maybe belonging to a group. So truly, I have absolutely nothing against people expressing themselves the way they choose - the way a person dresses can really say a lot about who they are... or who they want people to think they are! And it shows they aren't a part of the masses, a concept of which I thoroughly approve. However there is tasteful and not-so-tasteful.

    Which makes me wonder... are they going to look back years later at pictures and say "what was I thinking?!" I mean I look back on pictures of me in spandex pants and slouch socks and neon tops and bangs poufed out with a can and a half of hairspray and remember thinking I would never dress any other way! Then there were mullets and the grunge era (remember the cut-off shorts over thermal underwear?) and a slough of other odd trends we all pass through.

    Yeah, the music too. I tend to like a little of almost everything, but some of it's a little over-the-top, even for me!

    I could really do without the guys in girl pants thing, as well as the girls in no pants thing (I guess they're supposed to be dresses) but anyway... as The Smalls would say "To Each A Zone."


    | Posted on 2010-07-18 00:00:00 | by Soul-Hugger | [ Reply to This ]
      I have mixed feelings about this,Its written well and IS very funny(in a Borat kind of way),but the thing I don't like is that its just too easy to pick on emos,everyone already knows these things about them and most people have the same opinion.I didn't get anything from this rant I haven't already heard before you see.But it was WRITTEN well,I admire your honesty cos I'm sure you knew some people would be offended if they read it,I wasn't because I'm not Emo but I don't care to join in the bashing cause it just makes
    them even more closed off.By God I think the music sucks though,If you wrote this about the band you saw I guess its not so harsh.Hope you don't mind me commenting I just read this and thought Id say what I thought.
    | Posted on 2007-03-20 00:00:00 | by Raphael | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow..well you've got some opinions. Emos are nice, suicidal but nice. Sure their style is a little wack, but so is the rest of worlds style. If I was emo, this little write here would have hurt, but i'm not, so f*ck it. I'm not a fan of guys in girl pants, just choose they havn't got a penis, which is sad..Now you didn't mention how emo guys wear makeup, hello!??! How could you forget that..I'm a huge fan of guys with makeup, only if they can pull it off..And as for the opinion on the drummer, I don't think anyone can substitute for Joey Jordison, Slipknot is my favorite band, so I should know..Joey f*cking rules!!!! But anyway great write here, I loved it.

    | Posted on 2006-06-13 00:00:00 | by rainbowXrazors | [ Reply to This ]

    Dude, you said this straight up... I love honesty.

    I love dnb myself... that last sentence is so effin' true for me... but shoosh lol. Actually, I love all music... each genre has some gems in my opinion... but I write/play/sing my own stuff (open mic nights so far... possible MC'ing to dnb in a jazz/reggae fusion style ... anyway, I'm blabbing lol), so I think muso's have to have a broad range of taste... otherwise it gets same old, who gives a flying fu.ck etc etc. Same with fashion... just be yourself... don't jump on the freakin' wagon just because everyone else is... that's what I find lame.

    This made me laugh.... thanks for that.

    | Posted on 2006-06-29 00:00:00 | by alteredlife | [ Reply to This ]
      Those [censored] emo [censored]ers.
    I mean, I think they're funny and all, but I stop laughing when I realize they're not trying to be funny and thats just how they are.
    What bothers me the most is when they wear pants that were made for girls. (Which I'm glad you pointed out.) Is that supposed to make a statement? If it is, I missed it. I don't like guys who look more feminine in my pants than I do.
    I like the "6-year old girl on Helium" comment.
    Hah that made me laugh.
    lol A plastic spork. You are funny.

    Anywho, I enjoyed this.

    | Posted on 2006-06-28 00:00:00 | by Liv2LoveThePain | [ Reply to This ]
      I hate emo music as much as I hate the christian rock on the local radio station. It sound hollow and is devoid of all spirituality. The only purpose I see for an emo cds is using it as a coaster. Cds make nice coster and if you put the reflective side up you can even tell which name's on the front. peace
    | Posted on 2006-06-13 00:00:00 | by shaman | [ Reply to This ]

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