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Author: mimi
ASL Info:    30/f/ny
Elite Ratio:    3.66 - 597 /390 /111
Words: 100
Class/Type: Poetry /Serious
Total Views: 1587
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 653


any title suggestions?


scream as tears
stream down and pool
at my feet.
i dream as fears
seem to crowd
leaving me beat.
coping and hoping
turning the page
yelling with rage.
as i engage in war.
War with despair
complaining that life isn't fair.
not wanting to care.
Good thing it was a dream.
I awoke with my scream.
jumped to my feet.
To dance to the beat.
Ready steady and
capable of engaging
with he battles of the day.
Ready to say.
Hello, my name is Anna
and I'm an alcoholic.

Submitted on 2006-06-14 17:15:59     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!


  I think this is a lot deeper then it actually sounds when you read it yourself. I am not sure whethere I like the rhyming scheme because it's hard to follow, but I like this peace, it's pretty good and makes you think. Keep it up. All the best.

| Posted on 2006-06-14 00:00:00 | by JetPilot | [ Reply to This ]
  Wow, that was some poem. I loved how you wrote it. This poem made me feel sad at first, but at the end I felt better. A family member of mine was an alcoholic, and unfortunately he is no longer with us. But this poem shows that whoever it was about hadn't given up.
| Posted on 2006-06-18 00:00:00 | by PiperH | [ Reply to This ]
  a title to this should be called

gream raged
| Posted on 2006-06-14 00:00:00 | by thelastone | [ Reply to This ]
  pools is pulls that is the only thing I saw wrong

umm, if this was a dream, then you shall need to know, dreams are dreams and nothing but dreams lol peace
| Posted on 2006-06-14 00:00:00 | by thelastone | [ Reply to This ]
  As a "friend of bill", I got a LOT out of this one. I really enjoyed the beat and rhythm the poem has, and the way that the rhyme scheme changed half way through which added a sense of urgency to the reading... I found myself picking up the pace of my reading when I hit that part, and racing through the rest of the work, getting all anxious feeling and panic-y... Any writing that can evoke that is amazing, in my opinion.
| Posted on 2006-06-15 00:00:00 | by jer | [ Reply to This ]
  LOL...I like the title Coping.....Better than AA...the other one seemed a little long to me too. :) But as I was a brain pop! LOL...
| Posted on 2006-06-15 00:00:00 | by .:eVe:. | [ Reply to This ]

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