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Night Time


Author: usglen
ASL Info:    60-Male-Garden Grove,CA
Elite Ratio:    3.12 - 59 /71 /44
Words: 95
Class/Type: Poetry /Serious
Total Views: 1113
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 578



Description:


This is something I wrote early one morning.


Night Time



NIGHT TIME

The streets are quiet
All windy and warm
The door is closed so no harm
Air comes through a window.

It did not do it with much dough
Busses all gone for the night.
The door is shut tight.
I feel the air on my nose.

The night is cool.
I now feel the wind because I’m nobody’s fool.
Each hour I sleep and I still yawn.
I rise at dawn.

With the dawn I rise
Not to despise,
I’m awake for the day.
With not any writing pay.




Submitted on 2006-06-16 14:57:24     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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Comments


  This poem has potential. You are aiming to describe the atmosphere, and I can quite easily grasp of what you are talking.
But you are not focused, your thoughts are jumping around. Try to synchronize a little better your feelings and descriptions of night and dawning.
Also the flow is a bit rough.
| Posted on 2006-06-18 00:00:00 | by Poly Jean | [ Reply to This ]
  That is my favorite time of the day. the mroning. the coffee seems frsher at that time lol
this a fav . I liked it also cause it put me in that atmosphere of the moring you described
peace
| Posted on 2006-06-16 00:00:00 | by dudethis | [ Reply to This ]


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