Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: THINGS YOU SAYdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Psyve
    ASL Info:    53/M/ Bahrain
    Elite Ratio:    3.29 - 75/102/60
    Words: 103
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Venting
    Total Views: 732
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 595



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTHINGS YOU SAYdots
    -------------------------------------------



    Oh, you bore me to the seams
    With your sorrows and your dreams,
    And the tales of things you gave up just for me-
    You tell me when I came,
    That I was bound in mental chains,
    But you never really tried to set me free!
    (And I'm going…)

    You say it hurts so much
    For you to speak about your past,
    And then you tell me of the many things you've lost-
    You tell me when I came
    That I was blind and I was lame,
    But you gave me sight and freedom at what cost!
    (And I'm gone…)




    Submitted on 2006-06-22 11:23:37     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Like most of my lyrics on this board, this one was originally written as a song and, should you care to, you can hear me perform it by clicking on the link below

    http://soundclick.com/share?songid=7023124

    If you do have the patience, I would be very interested to know what you think of it.

    Psyve
    | Posted on 2010-04-16 00:00:00 | by Psyve | [ Reply to This ]
      The title in caps was weird, it almost got me dizzy, but its also what got me to reading this. I think I liked th first stanza better than the second, I'm not sure why..Sometimes being free isn't so nice, everything comes with a punishment and a cost. I liked the comparison between the last lines of each stanza, you were trapped, and bored..then you were free but payed the price..A heafty one i'm guessing..Anyways, great piece!

    Lucy
    | Posted on 2006-06-24 00:00:00 | by rainbowXrazors | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    107983

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    Snippet written by Daniel Barlow
    Reliquary of Writ written by HisNameIsNoMore
    None the Wiser written by endlessgame23
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Adoration written by TheStillSilence
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    Lost Inside the Race written by ForgottenGraves
    The Human Harmonic written by Daniel Barlow
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Dream written by closetpoet
    Florida's Autumn Solstice written by closetpoet
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The World written by jjd
    Mystery Read written by kyserin
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    The Abyss of Love written by poetotoe
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23
    Night- time written by Daniel Barlow
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    untitled written by Outlaw
    Not the Devil, but the Wind written by endlessgame23
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry