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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Tender Momentsdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Vibrant
    Elite Ratio:    2.7 - 855/538/131
    Words: 34
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 876
    Average Vote:    4.0000
    Bytes: 277



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTender Momentsdots
    -------------------------------------------


    We talked earlier
    you and me

    l looked at you
    you held my hand

    Time's sand
    scrammed

    Too special
    for limits

    Warm thoughts
    we shared

    While the world
    continued




    Submitted on 2006-06-26 12:34:54     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      Short and sweet, really sweet.

    Warm thoughts
    we shared

    While the world
    continued

    I love things like that, it gives the idea of the two people being so absorbed in each other that they pay no attention to everything going on around them, like the world goes on as normal while they together feel anything but normal. Even though the poem says they were jusk talking from the few short sentences and the title you can tell there's a deep love between them.
    I may be reading too much into it but that's how it made me think.

    Time's sand
    scrammed

    I didn't think those lines were that good, well actually I thought Time's sand was a great start and then I didn't like scrammed, it just seems like an ugly word to me in such a lovely piece of writing. That's just a little personal opinion though.
    Tender moments is a great title, it gives a lovely feel to the poem before you've even read it.

    So overall it's good for such a short poem, sweet, clear and to the point.
    | Posted on 2006-06-26 00:00:00 | by Sagirlie | [ Reply to This ]


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