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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: 82nd Street Bluesdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: DeadGod
    ASL Info:    20/M/OR
    Elite Ratio:    3.22 - 61/103/31
    Words: 138
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Alone
    Total Views: 960
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 978



    Description:
       The rhythm of this song is similar to Johnny Cash's "Folson Prison Blues." 82nd Street is a main thoroughfare that runs through Portland, Oregon, my hometown. This song is a twin to my other poem, Inviolate, though both were written at different times about different people.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dots82nd Street Bluesdots
    -------------------------------------------


    You ask me why I'm smiling
    You look me in the eye
    You weren't expecting nothing
    From my cocktail-chased reply

    But my truths were stuck in rapture
    Somewhere between my lies

    I simply keep on smiling,
    While something crucial dies.

    I'm naked here and crying
    You're lying on the bed
    Calm whispers in the darkness
    of a dream that woke up dead

    And I'll tell you when you're sleeping
    The things you'll never know,

    The night-bound trains are passing;
    You'll never hear them go.

    The curtains on your window
    Will keep light off this wreck
    Your lust is dripping slowly
    From the bite wounds on my neck

    You ask me why I'm smiling
    I gently close my eyes

    And sadly keep on smiling
    While something in me dies.





    Submitted on 2006-06-26 15:36:47     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    ||| Comments |||
      I really like this one. It's very nice and it had a part that reminded me of vampires, whihc is always good for me, because I like vampires.
    Anyway, I can see some resemblence to the other poem tht you wrote in which you pointed refernce to this one. Very similiar descriptions and images or pictures. It had the slight drip of lonliness though, like the person is afraid no one will love them...that's what I got out of it at least. But this was again a very nice write. Can't wait for more.

    *tox*
    | Posted on 2006-06-26 00:00:00 | by Toxic_Rayne | [ Reply to This ]
      This is a really clever write
    To me you are referring to how a man when he falls deeply in love sometimes fells he loses a part of his true self and becomes exactly what his soul mate wants for him to become
    This is true in a lot of cases but Thank God Not in all of them
    I Really Like how you created a fantastic Flow to this Write
    Great Job My Friend
    God Bless
    Ron
    | Posted on 2006-06-26 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]


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    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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    January 10 07
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