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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Addicteddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Angel_of_Hate
    ASL Info:    18/Male/New Mexico
    Elite Ratio:    2.8 - 11/18/12
    Words: 140
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 742
    Average Vote:    1.0000
    Bytes: 905



    Description:
       It describes itself


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAddicteddots
    -------------------------------------------


    Trip on this shit
    Get spun on what I say
    Sit down and calm yourself while I proceed
    Because I'm the last drug you'll ever need

    I'm gonna get in
    I'll play around with your mind
    Trust me, this is gonna hurt
    But just let me see what I can find

    I'll be the greatest thing at first
    You'll experience things you've never felt
    In the end I'll leave you with an unquenchable thirst
    That of which you can't stand

    You'll never want to live without me
    You won't be the same after I'm gone
    You'll search for me 'til death
    But I am that which you will never find again

    After I'm done
    You'll ask me who I am
    And my answer will be
    I am love and you will never see me




    Submitted on 2006-06-27 23:21:25     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Wow, I never could had guessed the end! I liked this poem, the rhymes go smoothly and I loved the attitude that you started it with. Now, I like the poem, but it is not what I'd call perfect. There are parts where you could change the words to make it fit in better. For example here: "I'll be the greatest thing at first
    You'll experience things you've never felt
    In the end I'll leave you with an unquenchable thirst
    That of which you can't stand" - Unless you don't really care about having a pattern with the rhymes, you could rephrase that last sentence somehow. Fun poem!
    | Posted on 2006-06-27 00:00:00 | by April0414 | [ Reply to This ]
      Nice work! But I wonder, are you saying that after finding one love and losing it, you will never find another? I like the way this is written, good rhymes and flow to it. You have a surprise ending kind of..with saying its love. I like it. but dont give up on finding another love, if this is written from personal experience...I donno..i guess im more of a romantic...but I do understand and can relate. love is special, and when you lose it, its hard to find again. good work. ~Nichole
    | Posted on 2006-06-28 00:00:00 | by butterfly_chi5 | [ Reply to This ]


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