Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: The life of a convictdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: heavy knowledge
    ASL Info:    15/m/slidell, L.a.(N.O.)
    Elite Ratio:    2.72 - 106/156/34
    Words: 289
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 822
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1550



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe life of a convictdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Niggas locked up in solitary playin solitare
    All because gun smoke was dispersed amongst the air
    You say you dont own a gun and you whern't there
    But a glance at a tattoed tear under ur eye makes a cop stare
    And becomes his ether to his flame of prejudgement
    And now u have reached a point of resentment
    Lips are pink, skin is a tinted shade, and ur nose is over grown
    Now u thinks its sill that your proud to call the ghetto your home
    Now your in a cell that u can't call ur own and neither can u say the same about ur azz
    Just because Big Red took your man hood a ran through it like a lawnmore does grass
    You become a jailbird who's song goes unsung
    Bumb Big Red in the hall and u find a fork in ur lung
    Wakin up with a lite in ur face tryin to predtermine wether your in heaven or back in hell
    But still u wake up in jail just moved to a differnt cell
    This time ur locked up with a man from a past life whom your soul seems to know
    And all u talk about is the outside and how u cant wait till u see your hoes
    But even more
    You miss doin a Banner and get down on the floor
    But anyways
    This happens to be a differnt day
    Your cell mat hung out with the wrong croud for confused reasons
    So now he wont be able to see the next season
    Pass and change
    Like a puzzle that seems to rearange
    See you when you get out
    So the dawn of your new life can start to sprout




    Submitted on 2006-06-28 00:13:57     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I've been there several times and this depressed me. It is a little different in CA. Nobody is in chains all of the time. Also nobody has to lie on the floor. I'm glad that you wrote this. Keep up this type of poetry. Good luck to you.
    | Posted on 2006-06-28 00:00:00 | by usglen | [ Reply to This ]
      I have never been there. But this seems like a very mature subject for somebody as young you are. Very depressing material and I am assuming that is the point of it.
    | Posted on 2006-06-28 00:00:00 | by St. Agatha | [ Reply to This ]
      this one isn't as good as the stuff that u had been writing right before the storm. i guess u lost the lyrical flare kid. u better get back on the grind. oh by the way...try leaving real comments next time. now i gotta catch up with all those comments cuz of u, u skank!
    | Posted on 2006-06-29 00:00:00 | by unknown soldier | [ Reply to This ]
      Quite potent in information on this type of lifestyle Chaz. Vivid, but not overly graphic. I do feel that this was not as ground breaking as your previous works. Although it was good, it seem like something changed with your style. I would only suggest that you may want to give a even more more grim account of this lifestyle and even out the flow. Make it more in your face. Other then that, you did a good job.

    Catrina
    | Posted on 2006-07-01 00:00:00 | by Magnolia Steele | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    108694

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    This written by Chelebel
    Be Free written by hybridsongwrite
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    A Sonnet for Nina written by SavedDragon
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Wavelength written by saartha
    Song written by Daniel Barlow
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    Transparent written by Daniel Barlow
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    new moon written by CrypticBard
    untitled written by Chelebel
    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Linger written by saartha
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Incubus written by monad
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Ten Poems written by Wolfwatching
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry